you should try and entice people in by describing SOMETHING about the track, i guess a lot of people just don't bother to open the thread.
There are some audio atrifacts which don't sound healthy during the intro phrases. Mixdown needs some work i think but im listening on headphones, sounds bassy heavy. Some variation on the drum pattern wouldn't go amiss. The high-hat and the snare seem unbalanced, mixdown again. Heavy idea, and nearly 'there'