My first Breakbeat track, Feedback and help very much appreciated.

SoS_Productions

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First of all, I want to introduce myself to everyone. I've been a longtime reader. My name is Paul. I was born in Belarus, and now live in Milwaukee, Wisconsin in the U.S. I have been producing minimal techno, hip-hop, etc.. for a bit now. I always loved breaks, and had some decent tracks that I created with FL Studio, but nothing special. For about a year now, I've been using strictly Logic 8 with a Midi controller. I'm hoping to one day create some decent tracks, and have posted my new track at the link below. Would love any and all feedback. Constructive criticism is even better. Thanks a lot.

The song is titled "2055" on http://www.myspace.com/sonsofsirius

Thanks in advance
 

MARKLAR

International Tracksuit Salesman
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welcome!
but this is a drum an bass forum not breakbeat
 

SoS_Productions

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I realize that mate. Basically this is a breakbeat track in search of some DNB flavor. You can only read so much, so I've decided to give it a go and do the best I could for a first timer, just to get some good constructive critisicm. The track is not polished by any means, and the lack of real heavy bass might take away the DNB component, but am I getting there at least?
 

MARKLAR

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well ull need to speed it up to around 170bpm.
the beat sounds nice but i cant hear any bass cos i am listnin pn my laptop
 
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