What will your Christmas Dinner consist of?

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by Moskit, Dec 14, 2009.

  1. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    I have a Duck, his name is Crispin.

    I have to kill him next Wednesday, he has been fed on Seed, various Herbs, any Pork trimmings & Fruit Peel for the last 3 weeks.

    He has his own Pond & some wild Ducks come to visit him, I think he knows he's not like the other Ducks, that he is unique in his own special way, he looks at me with contempt & bewilderment when I start squeezing his thighs & Breastal areas to measure there girth.

    The other Ducks laugh at him.

    After I have killed him, my Wife will pluck him, then I will wash him with Boiling Water & Blow-Dry him, leaving him overnight to hang, then I will paste him with a mixture of Water, Honey, 5 Spice, Chilli, Star Anise & Orange Juice & Blow-Dry him again, leaving him for another night to hang.

    On Christmas Day I will stick a straw up his batty & blow as hard as I can to seperate the now paper like skin from the fat layer, to increase crispiness levels, then I will stuff him with Spring Onions, Chives & Oranges & Roast him at 250oc for an hour until the skin is Brown & Crispy, then I will cover him in Tin-Foil, turn the heat down to 150oc & cook him for at least another hour.

    I will then steam the Pancakes & prepare the Spring Onion, Cucumber & sauces to accompany him.

    His memory will live on through our bellies, he will not have died in vein.

    I don't like Christamas Pudding/Cake, so I have my eye on a Gu Chocolate & Orange Cheesecake, which I will devour with warm Brandy Butter & a bowl of Henney.

    Pease divulge your Christmas Dinner plans, it is the best part of said festivity.
     
  2. JamesZero

    JamesZero aka Zero Beats

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    The child in me laughed at that :D

    I will just be having the usual, turkey, roast potato, veg, sausages wrapped in bacon etc etc etc
     
  3. safety

    safety double safety

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    four or five types of meat, not duck though, but i would love a duck at krismas. 3 types of potatoes, vegetables and a cauldron of gravy made from all the juices of the meat and vegetables.

    i never have room for desert
     
  4. rob_del_terror

    rob_del_terror - ̿ ̿'̵͇̿̿з=(•̪●)=ε

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    pigs in blankets
     
  5. BeyondTherapy

    BeyondTherapy Well-Known Member

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    [​IMG]

    PIZZA AND COCA COLA ( STANDARD EVERY XMAS FOR THE LAST 10 YRS ) cant wait

    im not into tradional roast etc spent to many yrs cookin n serving it up in the alps for brits on holiday ... im doing xmas morning over looking the sea (again not quite the alps snowboarding but hay aint all that bad) then drive 2-3 hrs to see the folks ( they would of eaten and worn those stupid paper crowns yuk not my scene )
     
  6. Mr G

    Mr G Old Cunt From 19 Longtime

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    Fucking super noodles!
     
  7. Yorkshire Tony

    Yorkshire Tony Active Member

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    Cooked Ham, Beef Wellington and Chicken for meat
     
  8. rob_del_terror

    rob_del_terror - ̿ ̿'̵͇̿̿з=(•̪●)=ε

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    since i started cooking christmas dinner i've found i cant eat it. i am gutted. i spend 3 hours in the kitchen and my appetite disappears. fuckin nightmare. christmas dinner was the best thing about christmas for me.
    this year my mum, brother and sister are comin as well. my mums gonna cook the turkey though so its only tit bits i need to sort.
     
  9. pitts

    pitts Member

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    turkey, beef, stuffing, roast potatoes, carrots, swede, sprouts, pigs in blankets and a shit load of gravy

    mouth is watering allready
     
  10. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    This is what copius amounts of Wine, Brandy & Lager were invented for.
     
    Last edited: Dec 14, 2009
  11. Harry3

    Harry3 Chuki

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    still cant figure out if your a really rich, eccentric, old fashioned 50 year old that lives out in an old country house or on an old farm.

    Or a 20-something that types shit while on crack.
     
  12. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    I've been trying to track down some of those Purple ones...

    The name eludes me.

    Fucking lush though, would love to try them roasted in the juices from the bird.

    Mmmmmmmm.
     
  13. Indi

    Indi Tha Original ThreadKilla!

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    Roast pheasant, served with buttered parsnips, sugar snap peas and shiitake mushrooms, and an orange and mint jelly, followed by white chocolate and orange baked cheesecake.
     
  14. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    Aslong as you're the hairless, pre-pubescant nipper I imagine you to be, my wank ammo is safe.

    I will choose my guise for the day, eccentric 50 year old, or 20 something bonehead, dependant on how I want to attack your rectum.
     
  15. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    Sexual.

    I knew you would out-sex me.

    You sexy fucking bastard you. :D

    The Pheasant is a noble & awesome Bird.

    You at home for Christmas or in China?
     
  16. spiderfran286

    spiderfran286 "Yes, squid pro roe..."

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    i cant decide yet, do i make my own, or do i go to my sisters?
     
  17. Gr1pz

    Gr1pz Aka - Align.

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    Preferably something vegetarian, But it'll probably be chicken or ham with stuffing and jello for desert and Ill have to make something myself since I dont eat meat....fuck being a vegetarian during holidays :(
     
  18. spiderfran286

    spiderfran286 "Yes, squid pro roe..."

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    why do u do this to urself?

    Meat + Heat = Tasty....
     
  19. Fortune^

    Fortune^ ( ͠° ͟ʖ ͡°)

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    You're a vegetarian and you eat gelatin?
     
  20. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    I saw a tasty as fook veggie recipe for an xmas style dinner on Something For The Weekend on Sunday.

    Some Roulade type thing, check out their website, looked relatively easy & different/festive.