Thanks all. Miszt, By cold hats I mean really resonant and abrasive. Even after putting some work in, making surgical cuts.
my first suggestion is change the hats, if you really love the hats, then try sculpting their sound using gentle/shallow and wide EQ cuts/boosts, rather than surgical points, i only do surgical eq for specific problems, rather than generally trying to alter the sound of a hat
also check your other sounds, esp between 1.5khz and 3.5khz, and if your hats go as low as 500hz, then check between 400-1khz aswell, do sum surgical EQ there if you find any resonant points, they will add to the abrasion of your hats.
Resonant points are more difficult to deal with, try the shallow EQ I suggested, but sounds to me like you need diffrent hats - some surigical EQ on the resonant points can help (esp on your other sounds), but bare in mind that the issue with resonance may not be the resonant point itself, but a conflict with another sound, or even a harmonic octave below or above the resonant point - surgical EQ is great, but u have to know what you are looking for, shallow and wide is where I'd start as I said (3 times, sorry, its important
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adding any effects like saturation, phase/stereo widening, chorus, are all going to distort the resonant points further, might make them fussier, might make them even more painful, i'd deal with the problem of EQ and mixdown before adding any effects