Story to brighten your day...

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by hyperd4eva, Apr 19, 2011.

  1. hyperd4eva

    hyperd4eva H&M SCARVES VIP Junglist

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    I used to work in my aunties pub when i was younger as a waiter. There was a new menu that came into play and we all had to learn the meals etc..

    Anyway i was always smoking weed and forgetting what they were called so my mate in the kitchen used to put them on the side for me to take out to the customers and tell me what they were. I used to say them over and over in my head so i didnt look like a twat.

    Any how one day there was a massive table in for a birthday. everything went well untill we got to taking out the deserts. The usual thing happened he put down a chocolate fudge cake said what it was, and away i went.

    the next dish he puts down and says ' one spotted cock ' so without speaking i went up to the big table and shouted over everybody's chatting 'SPOTTED COCK ANYONE'? they all went quiet and looked at me asif i had a massive cock on my head. I then repeated it again getting frustrated at this point ' No one ordered a spotted cock then no?'

    Then some old geezer about 80 years old looked at me and his exact words were ' Its called a spotted dick'

    Then it hit me what a monumental prick i had been!

    They tipped me 10 quid that night aswell! :)

    Still gets bought up every year at familly do's!
     
  2. richie_stix

    richie_stix gomby plz VIP Junglist

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  3. tone090

    tone090 Bare back rider! VIP Junglist

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    what a cock
     
  4. richie_stix

    richie_stix gomby plz VIP Junglist

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    were you stoned when he did this to you? sometimes when im stoned and talking, i accidently slip in words from my sorroundings into sentences...
     
  5. Harry3

    Harry3 Chuki VIP Junglist

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    hahaha, that did make me lol
     
  6. Junglist_007

    Junglist_007 learning difficulties VIP Junglist

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  7. Forau

    Forau CONCUSSION RECS VIP Junglist

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    I didnt quite lawl. But i was almost there.
     
  8. MARKLAR

    MARKLAR International Tracksuit Salesman VIP Junglist

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    put a smile on my face
    but surely u shudnt of been stoned at work ay??:teeth:
     
  9. Controller

    Controller (╯'□')╯︵ ┻━┻ VIP Junglist

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    I laughed, but my day didn't need brightening. Thanks for your concern though
     
  10. DamageCase7

    DamageCase7 Better off dead. VIP Junglist

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    I cried, not with laughter, but with disgust and hate.
     
  11. ThePapa

    ThePapa Suffragette City.. VIP Junglist

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    Inwardly reeling at your faux pas Hyper...
     
  12. Ray Sparra

    Ray Sparra Member

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    at least you got a tip!!:rik:
     
  13. herojuana

    herojuana hairy kuala VIP Junglist

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    I do that sober...
     
  14. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Tribal Leader VIP Junglist

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    thats because your a mong. i laughed but id probably laugh at a rusty nail in my underarm im so hopped up on coffe its ridiculous, i only had a latte

    ---------- Post added at 07:24 ---------- Previous post was at 07:24 ----------

    also, this: groove rider and hype as sexy blue avatar people
    [​IMG]
     
  15. hyperd4eva

    hyperd4eva H&M SCARVES VIP Junglist

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    Nah dont think so.. just wasnt thinking straight. he obviously didnt think id call it that.
     
  16. ApeCat

    ApeCat Human Dubplate VIP Junglist

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    Nobody ordered a flecked penis?!!