Stop That Pigeon!

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by Alexi, Jun 12, 2009.

  1. Alexi

    Alexi Drench Audio

    Joined:
    May 21, 2007
    Messages:
    997
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bristol/Southampton
    I got in a couple of hours ago, went and sat down in my room and heard a clicking, I looked round a bit and there's a fucking pigeon in the corner of my room, sitting in one of the boxes that I keep my 7'' record collection in, must have come in through the window or the back door and it's shit all over some Specials and Toots & Maytals records and feathers everywhere.

    I tried grabbing it and it flapped away moving on to the next box, my next inspired idea was making a trail to the door out of a torn up slice of bread but it wasn't having that. Shot it with an air gun a couple of times but just makes more feathery mess, wasn't going to stab it coz I don't want blood over my records. So now I've left all the windows and doors open, surrounded it with rat poison which hopefully should be gone when I go back and check.

    Headbake for a friday afternoon.
     
  2. DJ NUERA

    DJ NUERA 5HEAD

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2008
    Messages:
    6,531
    Likes Received:
    168
    Location:
    CRANIUM
    EHAEHAHEAHEHAHAHEHAHE
     
  3. aflex

    aflex Member

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2008
    Messages:
    462
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    United Kingdom
    stab the fucker
     
  4. KEMZ

    KEMZ Blatant Royal Status

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2009
    Messages:
    1,249
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    UK
    that was funny to read. i like the way you take the nice 'give it some bread...birds love bread dont they?' approach, then quickly move on to the air gun and shoot the fucker
     
  5. ScottyEightSix

    ScottyEightSix HUGE EARS > COMEDY CHIN

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2007
    Messages:
    13,064
    Likes Received:
    623
    Location:
    CHINFORD
    This
     
  6. Alexi

    Alexi Drench Audio

    Joined:
    May 21, 2007
    Messages:
    997
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bristol/Southampton
    lol well my immediate thought was lighter and lynx can, but then the carboard boxs and records would suffer as well
     
  7. DJ NUERA

    DJ NUERA 5HEAD

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2008
    Messages:
    6,531
    Likes Received:
    168
    Location:
    CRANIUM
    :tut:
     
  8. tq2

    tq2 tq2 head banger

    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2009
    Messages:
    68
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    torquay
    Shot it with an air gun a couple of times but just makes more feathery mess, wasn't going to stab it coz I don't want blood over my records. So now I've left all the windows and doors open, surrounded it with rat poison which hopefully should be gone when I go back and check.

    that was funny lol
    u wanna grab it by the head and smack it off the wall lol
     
  9. *SweetPea*

    *SweetPea* LADY VINYL

    Joined:
    Dec 24, 2008
    Messages:
    1,946
    Likes Received:
    6
    Location:
    BRISTOL
    Oh no, I hate pigeons at the best of times, but when they're inside and flapping around all over the place?! Argh!!

    I hope it has gone when you go back and look.
     
  10. ScottyEightSix

    ScottyEightSix HUGE EARS > COMEDY CHIN

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2007
    Messages:
    13,064
    Likes Received:
    623
    Location:
    CHINFORD
    Bring a cat in off the street or sommat
     
  11. viruss

    viruss zooot zooot!

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2008
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    sheffcity
    feed it dry rice from the packet it and it will explode...........
     
  12. Alexi

    Alexi Drench Audio

    Joined:
    May 21, 2007
    Messages:
    997
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bristol/Southampton
    I'd heard that rumour before, but I don't want it exploding blood & guts over all my stuff, thats why I'm not goin at it with a blade or hammer, prob will end up shooting it til it dies of internal bleeding, not nice but would be a clean end to the problem.

    I'm currently trying to keep it in the corner away from my decks, keyboard and vinyl I use for mixing
     
  13. deadaelus

    deadaelus Laughter in the Slaughter

    Joined:
    Apr 21, 2003
    Messages:
    1,818
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    Calgary, AB Canada
    wikkid story buddy!
     
  14. DJ NUERA

    DJ NUERA 5HEAD

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2008
    Messages:
    6,531
    Likes Received:
    168
    Location:
    CRANIUM
    Just keep telling it how worthless it is, tell it you dont love it etc.
    If it doesnt leave then it will probably just commit suicide. Clean & Simple
     
  15. Alexi

    Alexi Drench Audio

    Joined:
    May 21, 2007
    Messages:
    997
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bristol/Southampton
    yeah I can see the funny side, but doesn't make up for the birdshit covered records lol
     
  16. duffer

    duffer Under Mi SensI...........

    Joined:
    Jun 25, 2007
    Messages:
    1,254
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    BRISTOL BS11
    blunt object to the head,

    or make a little lasoo, throw it round him, pull tight, pigeon stew for tea tonight!
     
  17. Alexi

    Alexi Drench Audio

    Joined:
    May 21, 2007
    Messages:
    997
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bristol/Southampton
    I think its coming close to it the amount of times its flown into the wall lol
     
  18. deadaelus

    deadaelus Laughter in the Slaughter

    Joined:
    Apr 21, 2003
    Messages:
    1,818
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    Calgary, AB Canada
    Dude just get a blanket, throw it over the pidgeon.

    Pick up the blanket and walk it outside.
     
  19. JamesZero

    JamesZero aka Zero Beats

    Joined:
    Oct 2, 2008
    Messages:
    2,934
    Likes Received:
    109
    Location:
    South London
    You need to get these guys in!

    [​IMG]
     
  20. Alexi

    Alexi Drench Audio

    Joined:
    May 21, 2007
    Messages:
    997
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Bristol/Southampton
    easier said than done, this ones got quick reactions, tried it with a towel and just ended up with a fistful of feathers and a stained towel lol, will leave it a few mins til it calms down then stealth it