So when you die...............

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by jmzmaloney, Apr 18, 2010.

  1. jmzmaloney

    jmzmaloney ENTHUSED WITH ETHNOGRAPHIC PLUNDERPHONICS Staff Member

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    When you meet your maker what thing are you most scared about revealing whilst trying to get into heaven?
     
  2. dnbkingz

    dnbkingz bollocks

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    Now that would be telling...
     
  3. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

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    that one time when i was 12 and fucked my cousin. but in my defense, he was my uncle and very well endowed for a senior citizen. or maybe he was an old perv that molested me when i was six you know what i dont recall, thats funny cos it seemed so urgent at the time
     
  4. muzzadj

    muzzadj POW!

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  5. Radius

    Radius Give me back my passport u slags

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    Seeing as th efucker is all seeing, I'd ask so what you see then mate.try for the guilt trip..have a good laugh all the times I smashed my knee, or a girl told me to fuck off, how about when teh hardest guy in school knocked my teetth out and broke my nose ? How funny was that you cunt, now let me the fuck in...its all about the reverse psycology
     
  6. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

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    pretty clever, have to say
     
  7. Thin and crispy

    Thin and crispy Active Member

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    my true identity, bill clinton.
     
  8. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    when I was 13, I tied up this girl that was 12 with a jumprope, then beat the fuck out of her. By the time I was done, her lip was split, her wrists were bleeding from the rope cuttin into them, one of her eyes was swollen shut, she was missing two teeth, her small tits will entirely black and blue, her pussy was bleeding, and I'm fairly sure that several bones in her feet were broken.

    When I let her down, she crumpled on the floor and went into a fetal position and just hugged her legs to her chest and sobbed quietly. I suddenly got very aroused seeing that, so I pulled out my dick (I has actally hit puberty 12, and was hairy, balls dropped and everything functioning) and started jerking off quietly. Eventually, I started to breathe harder, and she noticed what I was doing, and she just looked at me with this look of absolute horror on her face. It was at that moment that I climaxed and sprayed probably my biggest load of cum ever all over face and chest.

    Then, I picked up her torn shirt from the ground, wiped off my dick and tossed it to her. I told her to clean herself up and that if she ever told anyone, I would go to her house and kill her while she slept, and that if anyone asked who hurt her, she should say a bunch of highschool kids did it. When I think back on it, I think she was the first girl I ever loved...
     
  9. greddie

    greddie Super Sir Loin

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    i dont belive in a god, but i do like the idea of some kinda heaven being a Massive comfy sofa, with loads of drink, food and smoke and a HUGE HD screen with a multi-angled play back of your life and you have the remote.

    but i cant think of much that i wouldnt tell the doorman should it arise...
     
  10. SmallVictoriez

    SmallVictoriez Teen Pop Sensation

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    Sleeping with your mother :teeth:

    Moskit, you're one twisted dude.
     
    Last edited: Apr 19, 2010
  11. luciduk

    luciduk Active Member

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    moskit have you ever considered writing a novel of this nature, it seems you have a nack for it.


    and if god exsists he lerks in the collective conciousness of everybody so he kinda already knows everything youve ever done, hes probably just asking you to test your honesty!
     
  12. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    Why don't you just come out & say he's a sly cunt, that has nothing better to do with his time than mislead people & put ash in the skies.

    Go on, call God a cunt...

    He'll hear it & then test you at a later date.
     
  13. luciduk

    luciduk Active Member

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    god is a blatent cunt!


    krshna on the other hand is a complete dick
     
  14. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

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    you people should make sure you wear earthed boots with thick rubber soles, i have a feeling youre long over due for a good few lightning bolts.
     
  15. dnbkingz

    dnbkingz bollocks

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    He will smite. My god he will smite.
     
  16. Dan M

    Dan M hard gay northern bear

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    ad then god said "climb aboard" and welcomed you with open arms into the kingdom of heaven
     
  17. hyperd4eva

    hyperd4eva H&M SCARVES

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    i once threw a brick at an expenses carp on a college trip. then watched as it died on the surface of the water..
     
  18. SLow

    SLow Quadrospazzed life-glug

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    When I see small girls in the street I wonder what their face would look like a) mid orgasm and b) with my cum dripping down their chin.
     
  19. A-JAY

    A-JAY Active Member

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    At 13? what a downer never pleasing a bird since lol

    you defo get to heaven just for your poor baby gravy output !

    ---------- Post added at 16:12 ---------- Previous post was at 16:11 ----------

    i dont get this its just a weird thing to say imo
     
  20. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

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    why? its a perfectly healthy response for a young male