Smooth...

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by YOUNG TUNA, Feb 18, 2006.

  1. YOUNG TUNA

    YOUNG TUNA IT'S ME BITCHES

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    Ok I was on this cruise from Helsinki to Stockholm. We were with some gals in our room and I asked this this one gals name. She said that it was the same name as this boat (boat name was Silja Symphony, and Silja is a finnish girl name). Was pretty drunk and it just came to mind it has to be Syphony. So I said like wooow Symphony whadda beatiful name and everybody started laughing and one of my friend gave me a high five saying "SMOOTH! :2thumbs:" :DD:d*D Like wtf...

    This other time I was in a bar, and on the dancefloor I saw this fine girl dancing and I started to follow her later. She sat in a table and I sat next to her. She took a cigaret and was like waiting for a light so I paniced and took the nearest matchbox on the table and started giving her some fire. But the matchbox was of course wet and I tried like 3 matches but none of them didnt even lit. Then after that she found a ligher and started teaching ME how to use it... SMOOTH.

    Oh and this one actually happened today! I was smoking a fag while waiting a bus, then this japanese girl comes and starts like smiling and bowing like wtf. I bowed my head and smiled back. Then the bus came and I flipped the cigaret from my hand, but the wind took it nicely and it landed on the girls FACE!!1 :DDD:d I was too embarrased to even say sry so I just went to the bus and sat still, SMOOTH.

    This one happened actually to one of my friend but. He was drinking at home and accidently dropped a cigaret in to a wine bottle. Then he thought that he could still drink the wine if he filtered the smoke out somehow. So he went to the kitchen and took this filter thing used in cooking with lots of holes and stuff. Then he poured the wine throu the thing and the cigaret was left on the filter. So there he stood, with wine all gone in the sink and the tobacco in the filter. Smooth man... smooth.

    Anything similiar happened to you guys? :|
     
  2. moriaty

    moriaty Active Member

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    this one time, my wall was full of holes. so i filled them with some plaster. then, i had to go over it with some sandpaper.
    afetr i was done, it was smooooth...
    :alchy: :oscar:
     
  3. Indi

    Indi Tha Original ThreadKilla!

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    Gordo you assclown :teeth:
     
  4. YOUNG TUNA

    YOUNG TUNA IT'S ME BITCHES

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    nice1!
     
  5. mesh

    mesh Active Member

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    :rofl:


    hey man thats smoo0oooth
     
  6. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

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    AEHAEHAEHAE thats funny check this oout
    i was working down the docklands in this warehouse where id steal just about everthing that wasnt chained to the wall or nailed to the ground. so this one time we got in 4 pallets of royal vodka. shortly after i had like 20 liters under my bed (kept it under my bed for some reason). needless to say i threw some mad parties around that time. so this one time i threw a dinner party and around 2300 everyones REALLY drunk and were down to my last bottle of vodka in which my man puts his cigarette butt. i was like what the fuck do you think youre doing??? he was like oh... wait no problem ill fix it. so he goes into the kitchen with the bottle. i thought cool hes going to fish it out. he comes back with no bottle. i looked at him and i said: you... poured the bottle in the sink didnt you. he answers yes. theres no more vodka is there. he was like no. smooooooooooooooth.

    this other time im high as fuck on charlie in the bar chattin to this girl who thought i was a rapper and i was like yeah im a rapper goddamn right i am and i spit a verse and she was well impressed and started singing to me and it was going really well i was in there no doubt but then my phone rings and this girl whom id named 'the baron' (cos shes like a baron tellin people what to do all the time and shit) had changed her name on my phone to 'my girl' which of course the girl i was mackin on happened to see. now i couldve dismissed this in a million ways but i was just stumped and she was like oh ok alright i see no need to explain. no nookie that night. smooth.
     
  7. mesh

    mesh Active Member

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    at least you were high
     
  8. $marty

    $marty Dexcell Staff Member

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    Does she happen to fly around in a red plane at all?
     
  9. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

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    she aint fly no way no how brother beleive that shit
    when shed call she wouldnt even bother with hello or anything like that and just say 'WHERE ARE YOU!'
    dumb bitch im throguh with her 100%
     
  10. YOUNG TUNA

    YOUNG TUNA IT'S ME BITCHES

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    Hahhah :D good riddance!
     
  11. Indi

    Indi Tha Original ThreadKilla!

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    ..............and this one time, at band camp.............:oops_sign
     
  12. moriaty

    moriaty Active Member

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    :uberlaugh

    [​IMG]
    Hey Indie! Waz ze Chinezee fer Assclowne ??
    :teeth::wazzzup:
     
  13. moriaty

    moriaty Active Member

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    right

    so im at this party, during my ketamine honeymoon, and this hot as bird comes up, and starts chatting me up (dont ask, dont know what was goin through her mind at the time, probs chemicals...).
    Beeing the drug fiend i was at the time, i couldnt understand a fukin word of her sexy yet incoprehencible dublin accent, let alone mouth words of my own. So i did a bit of the nodding and smillin, and thankfully the bird was whizzin her gorgeous tits off, and her chattin was un-tameable..
    So after few minutes of blabbin, and taking into account the frequent arm brushing, head tilting, and a certain glee in the chicks eyes, i thought it was time to start getting in there, and i make my dive to kiss her.
    So, the moment i thought i gently landed my lips on her's, she pulls back fast, i open my eyes, and she's walking back, away from me, holding her nose and giving me the evil eyes....
    (Now, let me tell you a bit bout K...
    A very bad drawback on beeing high on that filth, is the poor depth perception it leaves you with..
    another bad thing is that if you snort quite a bit, your face goes numb...)
    So basicly, the chick was taller than i had imagined in my K hole, and i actually aimed for her neck instead of her lips, with my forehead smashing into her up-to-that-point pretty nose..
    almost godsend, my mate came up to me, and advised me to leg it with him, while informing me that he couldnt care less about my homelands customs and traditions, but thats defo NOT the way to hit on chicks in this country..
    smoothage....
    reckanize:jacko:
     
  14. Indi

    Indi Tha Original ThreadKilla!

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    :rofl: Been there before Gordo mate.
    Except I was dancing with a bird after a nosefull of Ket (not too stable you know like), and when I went to kiss her I slipped and fell over, grabbing her by her tit and dragging her down with me.
     
  15. Dustek

    Dustek Finished the PhD

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    Yeah, but it costs about 50 quid a bag.

    This topic is like a scene from Human Traffic - DNB edition.
     
  16. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

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    GORDO MATE PRICELESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    you too indi haha wtf.

    ive got a similar one when in this club in greece,
    and im sitting on a barstool after filling the place up (that was my job, get people in the club) so the place is full and im chatting to this greek goddess and we start snogging and its one of them rock and roll moments (that rolling stones tune 'out on your own' blasting) and i fall the fuck off the chair, barstool and all, like tiiiimbeeeerrr. smooth.
     
  17. mesh

    mesh Active Member

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    speaking of timber, at some dnb night in Perth about 6 years ago. My mate knew the DJ and they both wanted a spliff so we're in the large DJ booth ducking down behind and getting truly blazed. On top of all the usual beer etc ...
    after becoming totally stoned we really want to get out of the booth; part of the decor for the night was an 8 foot tall fake roman column sitting either side of the decks, at side of booth. I put my hand on one of these massive fuckers ever so slightly as I exit the booth, in full view of about 400 people, and watch in horror as it starts tipping toward the decks and DJ!!!!!
    I lunged at it and just saved it from toppling.... but how do you recover from that? you don't.
    smoooo0000ooooth.
     
  18. YOUNG TUNA

    YOUNG TUNA IT'S ME BITCHES

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    Hahaha the guys who made Human Traffic could write a sequal with these stories, and the movie would be based on those two junglist guys that you see on the original :D

    Got new jungle? :spliff:
    [​IMG]
     
  19. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

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    Classic mesh, absolute classic!!!!
    at least you caught the thing before it really went pear shaped. but yeah in that state of mind i cant imagine it being sort of stressful to say the least.

    haha sheep yeah true. i always crack up when they do that crazy skank in the recordstore.
     
  20. Dustek

    Dustek Finished the PhD

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    Isn't that the producer?

    The junglists were standing on the other side doing the Stalker dance :)