Sex tips thread

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by XoXoX roachspray XoXoX, Aug 28, 2015.

  1. XoXoX roachspray XoXoX

    XoXoX roachspray XoXoX Custom Title VIP Junglist

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    I want to make her eyes roll in the back of her head and maybe squirt but how?
     
  2. miszt

    miszt BASSFACE Royale VIP Junglist

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    send her round to mine
     
  3. XoXoX roachspray XoXoX

    XoXoX roachspray XoXoX Custom Title VIP Junglist

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  4. RUSSLA

    RUSSLA Glass Cobra VIP Junglist

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    Grow a bigger peenus
     
  5. XoXoX roachspray XoXoX

    XoXoX roachspray XoXoX Custom Title VIP Junglist

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  6. IV4

    IV4 DnBF Sheriff VIP Junglist

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    Try lasting longer than a minute.
     
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  7. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Tribal Leader VIP Junglist

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    Dutty flygyal likes to squirt on a fist, inna corner with di john miszt
     
  8. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Tribal Leader VIP Junglist

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    make her drink warm bleach and then try to use her laptop in bed laying on her side for an hour with a burglar in the apartment and get a tutorial on how to do a karate chop
     
  9. Teddy

    Teddy 60% Tribal Leader VIP Junglist

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    get her to swallow a piece of raw bacon with a length of string attached to it. penetrate the anus then yanks the piece of string causing her to vomit up the piece of bacon. during vomiting, the muscles in the anus become tightly clenched, causing an amazing sensation for you.
     
  10. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Tribal Leader VIP Junglist

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    pfffft amateurs donkey punch. course, that way she doesnt buck...
     
  11. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Tribal Leader VIP Junglist

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    I read both your comments in bassman voice & it worked really well... :)
     
  12. IV4

    IV4 DnBF Sheriff VIP Junglist

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    Donkey punch is so 2006. Trains are back in style though.
     
  13. sam the dnb man

    sam the dnb man Variation VIP Junglist

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    It's the simple things that count, like wiping the toilet floor after you piss all over it, because your dick decides to turn into the kind of sprinkler that Alan Titchmarsh would cream over.
     
  14. Bukakke-Fun-Boy-Deeniel

    Bukakke-Fun-Boy-Deeniel cum glazed fun boy VIP Junglist

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    if you don't know, get to know about the well placed thumb ....
     
  15. Teddy

    Teddy 60% Tribal Leader VIP Junglist

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    give her your credit card and pin number.
    100% effective.
     
  16. Bukakke-Fun-Boy-Deeniel

    Bukakke-Fun-Boy-Deeniel cum glazed fun boy VIP Junglist

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    yeah, credit card her right in the batty crease, works 60% of the time, every time!
     
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  17. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Tribal Leader VIP Junglist

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    eyes roll back in her head you say? squirt? easy peasy chinesy!

    strap her down in the bed, laying on her back, arms and legs firmly secured, start by flicking matches on her,
    hook her nipples up to a car battery (making them turn dark brown), then take a drill to her teeth.
    her eyes will roll back in her skull at some point during this process, her brain mercifully granting her brief
    reprieve from the sensory nightmare she is going through. slit her throat and she will squirt in a rather uninteresting pattern and then proceed to bleed out all over your goddamn sheets.

    then purchase a puppy and a bottle of acid. between work, the gym, and dinner at the harvard club, this will be relaxing.
     
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