Saving money help...

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by Catsel, Mar 3, 2010.

  1. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

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    ive got some money i wanna save.. im sure someone on here knows about savings.

    im on the moneysupermarket site and theres about 15 different types of saving?!

    anyone know which is best? isa, bond, offshore acc etc etc?


    ty
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 4, 2013
  2. Gumby

    Gumby New Member

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    why are you using a random site to save money? whats wrong with using a savings account from your bank? thats how i did it when i was saving to go overseas.
     
  3. alz

    alz compress to impress

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    stuff it in your matress man.

    isas fluctuate a shitload, i should have had like 10k in mine by now, started saving cash since i was 13, and ive got like 5k.

    offshore - be very careful where, most decent places will have like a 1-10k minimum starting deposit.

    matress is the best bet, when the banks all collapse again ull b laughing!
     
  4. Gumby

    Gumby New Member

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    the one with the highest interest?
     
  5. Blurr

    Blurr Wasted Selection

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    Money Saving Tip #24: Don't through out used pizza boxes, staple them to the walls to create some decorative insulation.
     
  6. dose.bs1

    dose.bs1 THE DADDY

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    I use an ISA
     
  7. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

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    [​IMG] in a sock. but dont wear the sock!!
     
  8. Gloxxy

    Gloxxy I SNORT COAL

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    Pedantic Grammar Tip #405: THROW not THROUGH

    Bingo!
     
  9. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    Get a wife that will blank you, guilt trip you & starve you of sex for weeks on end, if you spend money out of the high interest joint account, that you pay a set sum in via direct debit each week into.

    Best saving scheme ever.
     
  10. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

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    i forgot to mention. i don't want the government to know ive got it.

    basically ive got a cheque for 25k.. that needs paying into somthing.. if i pay it into my normal savings acc, then someone's gunna ask questions ent they? or am i just being paranoid...

    i wanna invest the money into somthing.. then come back 5 or 10 years later, and have millions more :D ..

    im not sure what to do with it. i could put it under my matress.. but ima be moving around alot in the next few years.. so doubt it would be safe there... i guess i could give it to someone in my family to look after.. but 1) they might steal it... and 2) it won't get intrest.

    i have a tendancy to chat shit.. so plz lemme know if i am.
     
  11. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

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    but one with the highest today. could go bust tomorrow..

    surley the one with the best average is better.... :confused: i really don't know! too much thinkin, makes me wanna get high n forget it for another day lol
     
  12. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    25k the goverment don't need to know about...

    lol

    Don't put it in any accounts then man.

    The only way you can do anything with it without the gov knowing is illigitimately.

    Launder it through a business under a different name, pay someone to put it in their account(s).

    Open account in false name etc.

    There are ways, if you've come across a dodgy 25k, surely you can come across a dodgy way to gain interest/profit on it?

    If you want more dodgy money from dodgy money, failing all the above - Put it into a drug selling venture.
     
  13. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

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    its not as dodgy as u think.. just the taxman might wanna peice.. cos im not working.. this is a bit of my income..
     
  14. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

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    Drugs Venture it is then

    PM Joey & Slow they might do you 2.8 of Cabbage for £15,000. :teeth:
     
  15. dnbkingz

    dnbkingz bollocks

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    Cash it under a fake account.
    Then deposit it in monthly installments into your own account.
    Make out like it's your wages or something

    ?????

    :teeth:
     
  16. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

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    this is a good idea.... with an offshore acc. pay money into that under a diff name... then pay that into real acc.. pretending im working for some random company.. (y)

    but i wudn't be saving it..
     
  17. Gloxxy

    Gloxxy I SNORT COAL

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    I vote drug fuelled bender for a year!
     
  18. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

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    been doin that for the past 10 years. got not much to show it for. :teeth:
     
  19. Borf™

    Borf™ Borf

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    I'll look after it for you.

    But I can't promise it will make any interest.

    In fact, It'll probably be gone in a few months.

    But maybe not.

    Worth a risk yeh?
     
  20. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

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    :gang_bang