My first track (slightly different)

if your laptop speakers are anything like mine, then good effort on whatever you make.

the kick is far too quiet, needs to be either turned up or get some boom in there, the bass is a bit loud overall, but i guess the whole tune is not bad, especially since it was made on laptop speakers, get some speakers asap
 
youve turned my half decent headphones into laptop speakers !!! youv got the ideas anyway but i think you need to get some headphones mate :)

edit.... or speakers ^^
 
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