Job interview

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by herojuana, Jun 24, 2013.

  1. herojuana

    herojuana hairy kuala

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2009
    Messages:
    5,594
    Likes Received:
    948
    Location:
    London/Sheffield
    I have one in a few hours.


    I want your advice


    So I don't do that
     
  2. Hombre-J

    Hombre-J Currently Ballsacked

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2009
    Messages:
    2,181
    Likes Received:
    524
    Location:
    Midlands, England
    Do anything for love.

    But don't do that.
     
    Moskit, H*product, Teddy and 5 others like this.
  3. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2002
    Messages:
    10,556
    Likes Received:
    2,520
    Location:
    www.easternpromiseaudio.com
    HAEHAEAEHHAEAEHEA HOMBRE J RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRULLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEE

    samuel, is it in a restaurant? because, if so, throw away fork, keep eye contact, and pin knife in the middle of table, where you sit, imagine the middle of where theyd put the plate.

    so the nigga knows youre serious. goddamn it.

    have your questions ready, gesticulate moderately, sit up straight, try and give both interviewers equal attention, have your banter ready, go through their product catalog on the website.

    most of all, have your banter ready. i did that by going on a few job interviews for jobs i didnt want, so to practice, before my main one. i called them dressed rehearsal.
    and i landed the gig. but its a special kind of banter, a special kind of mentality these interviews are driven by. after doing all this, i realize i might be a tad psychotic,
    but i think id like to become an interview expert. consult HR and so forth, because im pretty damn good at it. i told you about the five languages guy right? i almost feel sorry for him.
    but not really. for i am not capable.


    x, karl
     
    Eternaloptimist likes this.
  4. Shatner's Bosom

    Shatner's Bosom murder TANMUSHIMUSHI

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2012
    Messages:
    4,833
    Likes Received:
    1,142
    Location:
    Hummus
    I think I look at peoples hands when I shake them, I always forget to check when it happens, don't do that.
     
  5. grubbers

    grubbers bag of smashed

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2011
    Messages:
    1,220
    Likes Received:
    340
    Location:
    Boston
    What's the job? That would help a bit.
     
  6. Jwood27

    Jwood27 VICTIM

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2009
    Messages:
    8,126
    Likes Received:
    1,339
    Location:
    Cardiff
    purveyor of taches.
     
    herojuana likes this.
  7. ThePapa

    ThePapa Suffragette City..

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2010
    Messages:
    8,307
    Likes Received:
    659
    Location:
    West London
    Stay upright. Be alert your intelligence must shine through naturally. Try and be polite, conversational etc. You aren't going to have much experience of anything so they'll be going on your caliber alone. Do some prepping if they have a website. You're aiming to click with the interviewers but let that come naturally if it comes at all...don't force it.

    If you're popular or likeable in real life that will come across anyway. And it's the popular kids that often get the breaks let's face it.


    Clean shaven. Definitely clean shaven. And do try and keep your clothes on if at all possible.
     
    herojuana likes this.
  8. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2002
    Messages:
    10,556
    Likes Received:
    2,520
    Location:
    www.easternpromiseaudio.com
    get fked jaros. this benzo is kicking in like a mule over this liter of wine and im not sure i can stay coherent for much longer. but fk you jaros. so long as you know thigkslrhgnjsfä
     
  9. ThePapa

    ThePapa Suffragette City..

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2010
    Messages:
    8,307
    Likes Received:
    659
    Location:
    West London
    Did someone mention mules?

     
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 12, 2015
  10. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2002
    Messages:
    10,556
    Likes Received:
    2,520
    Location:
    www.easternpromiseaudio.com
    is this that same thread?
     
  11. t345e

    t345e Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2011
    Messages:
    1,206
    Likes Received:
    122
    Location:
    Bristol
    If they chuck you in at the deep end and make you do some on the job style interview where you have to prove your worth just jemember to always ask the customer if the want to upgrade their meal to a large for an extra 30p.
     
    bn14 and DeeGun like this.
  12. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2002
    Messages:
    10,556
    Likes Received:
    2,520
    Location:
    www.easternpromiseaudio.com
    trevor i do not truly beleive this thread was made for you
     
  13. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2008
    Messages:
    16,325
    Likes Received:
    2,085
    remember to sell yourself.

    why are you a better person to employ than anyone else?
     
  14. H*product

    H*product Heavyweight product

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2009
    Messages:
    1,219
    Likes Received:
    14
    Location:
    Bristol
    turn up with snaks. interviewers love snaks
     
  15. ThePapa

    ThePapa Suffragette City..

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2010
    Messages:
    8,307
    Likes Received:
    659
    Location:
    West London
    I've just rubbed some chilli into my japs eye if that's any help to you...not on purpose obviously.
     
  16. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2008
    Messages:
    16,325
    Likes Received:
    2,085
    how?
     
  17. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

    Joined:
    May 27, 2009
    Messages:
    4,365
    Likes Received:
    3,751
    Flagrantly cup your junk at some point, lick your lips in a massively pedophilic manner, mention that your dad died of cancer recently, spiit on your finger and moonwalk out styling your eyebrows with your freshly dispensed saliva...

    :jacko:
     
    Last edited: Jun 24, 2013
  18. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2008
    Messages:
    16,325
    Likes Received:
    2,085
    SAMEUL

    chek out this indian guy with red hair.

    interviewers love red hair.


    [​IMG]
     
  19. herojuana

    herojuana hairy kuala

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2009
    Messages:
    5,594
    Likes Received:
    948
    Location:
    London/Sheffield
    Armed (it seems retarded to use this word now, given the spend. Adumb can you please change his name to Akhmed so we can take armed back?) with this knowledge, I feel a lot more confident.

    It's for the regions biggest energy supplier, working as a programmer for them. The important thing is it can possibly sponsor me to stay out in Canada.
     
  20. Catsel

    Catsel Well-Known Dismember

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2008
    Messages:
    16,325
    Likes Received:
    2,085
    bend over for the boss.