got attacked by some cunt

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by co0ke, May 17, 2009.

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  1. co0ke

    co0ke windowlicker VIP Junglist

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    some hench cunt who i know nothing about smashed me in the side of the head whilst i was eating a kebab, proceeded to chase me the fuck into the kebab shop for whatever the fuck his reason was, where i cowered and took refuge like the pussy i am, whilst people blocked his entrance.

    reported to the police who were a couple meters down the road, they just said they got better things to deal with. cunts.

    already had little faith in the justice system, now zero, as they're like 'come in tomorrow and file a complaint'. biggest pisstake is that i went past the cunt in a taxi on the way home!
     
  2. 1995ting

    1995ting Active Member VIP Junglist

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    Your mother is appalled at the failure that you have grown into. She wishes she would of swallowed you when she had the chance. At the very moment when your alcoholic good for nothing dad had his penis inside her whore mouth, she knew what should've been done. On top of that your father should've nutted into a toilet, where your genetic material belongs and not inside a dog!
     
  3. Gumby

    Gumby New Member VIP Junglist

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    dude thats fucking rough! are you ok?
     
  4. chanty

    chanty Active Member VIP Junglist

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    Did he take offence cuz u were chammin on ya kebab? If so, eat wid ya mouth closed u deserve a whack
     
  5. Lucidproduction

    Lucidproduction i aint fraid of no ghosts VIP Junglist

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    lol.. shit man what a nuttah
     
  6. robhicks1

    robhicks1 Nuts about Zoo VIP Junglist

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    Thats absolutely shit mate.
    Hope that dick gets the shit kicked out of him next time.
     
  7. Textbook

    Textbook BUTTER VIP Junglist

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    for real, someone tried to stab me the other day. got away with just a slash, n blood all over one of my good t shirts. bastards.
     
  8. spiderfran286

    spiderfran286 "Yes, squid pro roe..." VIP Junglist

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    im fucking this girl who has a bf, im waiting 4 him to find out whats going on b4 shit kicks off.....
     
  9. Radius

    Radius Waiting for the hammer to fall VIP Junglist

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    too many bullys out there, and chickenshits with knives. All screwface and no banter makes jack a dull bwoy . next time remeber a good hard punch to the side of the neck ( right on the artery) will put any cunt down. failing that ears come of easy just grab and drop to teh ground. and if tha tdon't work, throw your kebab in his dface, and whilst the chilli sauce stings his eyes stamp on the side of his knee.

    Knives are more difficult...would not suggest trying to tackle someon with a knife unless you are proper on one, and even then they only have to get u once. But if you do , don't stab them back, and make sure you put the knife down a drain so they can't run up on you as you walk away.....

    If its a knife and u are takin on, spit in the eye to distract, grab knive and pull towards their thumb, they cannot hold on...but again, not the best idea.
     
  10. sam the dnb man

    sam the dnb man Variation VIP Junglist

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    next time try to bamboozle your opponent.
    ask him what his theory on dark matter is then as he thinks kick him in the bollox
     
  11. Radius

    Radius Waiting for the hammer to fall VIP Junglist

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    works for me though I find eth act crazy and wave bottle around works good too..always a classic when the god squad turn up on a sunday..then confuse tehm and shout Jezuz luvz ye.....but I tink yer a cont
     
  12. co0ke

    co0ke windowlicker VIP Junglist

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    ye safe for the words people. dont really know what i expected the police to do anyway, jus another pisshead at the end of the day.

    still, i always seem to be gettin in shit with people i dont know for no reason at all.
    not half as deep as some o the shit from spiderfran or textbook, and im ok so i'll jus count myself lucky!
     
  13. mansell

    mansell husk basically* VIP Junglist

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    gone down on her yet?
     
  14. spiderfran286

    spiderfran286 "Yes, squid pro roe..." VIP Junglist

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    hahaha i was waiting 4 u to say that....

    i aint yet, im gunna do it just 4 you tho!
     
  15. sam the dnb man

    sam the dnb man Variation VIP Junglist

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  16. mansell

    mansell husk basically* VIP Junglist

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    fran... it should be the first thing you do. it tastes better before also.
     
  17. spiderfran286

    spiderfran286 "Yes, squid pro roe..." VIP Junglist

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    goes without saying...
     
  18. mansell

    mansell husk basically* VIP Junglist

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    thats why i said it...
     
  19. Radius

    Radius Waiting for the hammer to fall VIP Junglist

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    To be fair if you want to go the grasser method, get down the station now, I assume its all on CCtv. So what you have to do is complain that a) someone nutted u, and b) despite witnesses etc the coppers did fuck all...ask why you pay your taxes etc...jut samke sure your clean of the grean, and dress to impresss...trust me wearing smart casual if you are asked to come in for questioning makes a big difference...first impressions really to count...if they think your just a normal fella who is not so bad, it goes a long way.
     
  20. Borf™

    Borf™ Borf VIP Junglist

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    I hate dickheads like this.

    When we were out last week my mate was fucked and wandering about, we went to get food and saw some huge guy starting on him for no reason. My mate could barely stand and this guy grabbed him by the throat so my mate grabbed a bottle off the floor and smashed him over the head with it. Cunt fell to the floor like a sack of shit and we made a hasty exit before coppers came. The dickhead got his commupence. He probably starts on someone defencless or smaller than him every week.
     
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