holy sh*t, 14. have i really become a dnb grandfather? goddam it...
anyway, if you are really 14, i want to tell you everything i know, so i can hear your tracks when you're 30. this is an excellent effort, i would touch on these things:
-vary your lead melody pattern more
-add more layers to the drums. maybe take a good break, high pass it, and drop it in. tinkering with the hi hats can add a lot of depth to the drums. i usually have 5-6 high hat layers, usually 3 or 4 sounds and a loop or two. here is a link to a track i am working on, you can hear the hi hat work well:
http://soundcloud.com/msmith222/transformer-080309
it takes a lot of time, but you can hear it...
-you could try to split the bass line up by frequency range (low, mid, hi) and effect each range differently. done well, this adds a lot of interest with the basses diving in and out of each other, especially if you vary the patterns also.
-the 1/2 time bit is a nice touch.
-maybe a pad, at least in the breakdowns?
keep it going, sounds awesome!