Fake Andy C Twitter account - lolz
- Thread starter wobbie
- Start date
Rum and Bass
Member
- Joined
- Jun 25, 2011
- Location
- Cardiff
no thats sigma hating on the rioters
- Joined
- Oct 29, 2007
- Location
- Near the Lake District
hahahaha
@RealJamesArgent Do you honestly think we care that you've had a healthy meal you oily fat talentless dickhead. Get things in perspective
ANDY_C_RAM Andy 'Executioner' C
Mrs is complaining saying she will not share the same bed as "me and my smelly bum." Well, I don't like him sleeping on the streets
@RealJamesArgent Do you honestly think we care that you've had a healthy meal you oily fat talentless dickhead. Get things in perspective
ANDY_C_RAM Andy 'Executioner' C
Mrs is complaining saying she will not share the same bed as "me and my smelly bum." Well, I don't like him sleeping on the streets
I take it this got shutdown for good. Whoever it was should definately start up again it was funny as fuck.
A bit sad I know but iv collected together the tweets i could find on the net and listed them below. Made me laugh again reading them.
"Can someone tell that roid monkey MC Det I want my Torchwood DVD Boxset back. He scratched the Stargate Universe collection I leant him.Tool
"I wouldn't buy a Dachshund. Their amusing sausage shape means they take 50% longer to stroke than other dogs, and time is money I'm Andy C"
"@FrictionShogun drumstep reminds me of a heavy ket session at Fabric, I was convinced the gateway to Narnia was below the monitor in room 1 "
"I just unlocked 3 new costumes for Ken on Super Street Fighter II Turbo, looks like that Turbulence Remix might be another few months."
@edrush need you to look after my facebook farm 2nite, crops need watering and there's a plough in the online shed. I'll give you 25 coins
To save on costly record sleeves I have started to glue records together that I don't play the B sides of. Thus creating a double A side.
@bassmentdnb Nice one, it was a good gig even if it did remind me of an episode of Fun House directed by David Lynch.
Merry Xmas to all my fans, also I will be increasing my DJ fee's by 2.5% in line with the planned VAT increase.
Listenin to that Breakage bit again. I got it wrong earlier, it sounds more like a Labrador with hooves dancing on a wave stricken boat
Looking forward to Fabric on 27th, always like playing there nice mix of people it's like Takeshi's Castle if it was filmed in Hackney
a pencil stabbed into a lump of blu tac makes an ideal holder for polo mints durin hectic gigs. Leaves a hand free for rewinds, salutes etc
@dragonjones dragons den idea 2 - 'Cash in the Addict' you give me a van and I drive about shaking the homeless down for any cash they have
@timwestwood maintain being 'down with the kids' by adopting a Simon Cowell haircut
@MissKatiePrice are you still with Alex? you always seem to be photographed with Gary Coleman that's all
@MCDET The Real Hustle is on BBC later, get some tips for Xmas
" Also giving away 75 signed copies of Nightlife 5 and an old pair of slippers Jeff reckons he made Turbulence in. Size 6 "
@kasracritical Nick & Gav just sent me a tune that sounds like a car alarm going off at an ADHD convention. You want it? Not up to Ram spec
I went to my first dyslexic rave last night. Everyone was taking F's and a bloke in the corner was trying to inject a Heron.
email info@shogunaudio as to why im a better dj then friction
friction -LOL People have been emailing the Shogun office with their 50 word explanation as to why Andy is a better DJ than me. Ill get my coat!
@Jaydandnb Jeff just made a tune that sounds like wasted but with drums that sound like a horse wearing ski's being kicked down a lift shaft
Just sent the Nightlife 5 winners their download codes . I'd like to thank the pirate bay for hosting and user bryangee001 for best seeder
I think I've totally ruined Rams sound by letting Gav & Nick release stuff that sounds like Commix having a migraine.
"@FrictionShogun we should have a B2B mix soon. You do the blending, I'll bounce about and take all the credit and charge a bit more then you"
At festivals I hang my record box in a tree and fill it full of water so it can be used as a nest for migrating sea birds
When I have gigs in earthquake prone countries I always DJ with a dog biscuit in my pocket so the rescue hounds find me 1st in an emergency
You know why women never produce? They don't know how to use reason or logic.
And fair play to Ed Rush, hasn't sold out and diluted the Virus sound. I have more money then him though, and that's what matters
"If anyone can lend me a Space Marine Terminator Squad & Ork Warboss with Attack Squig you'll have guest list for 4 at the next RAM night"
"@HighRankin You could come into the RAM clan in a heavy support role. Buy yourself a Chaos Space Marine Obliterator & Thunderfire Cannon"
"Just seen a new dubstep live act made up of a horse cantering on a snare drum, a downie kicking a skip and Katy B singing up a chimney"
Bit of a kerfuffle at my house, Nicks gobbed off to Guy Commix saying he looks like a shit Andy Murray working at Dixons.
Mrs is complaining saying she will not share the same bed as "me and my smelly bum." Well, I don't like him sleeping on the streets
I like my coffee like I like my woman: I don't like coffee.
Just sampling a spastic kicking a bin lid. Sub Focus needs a new kick drum, this will do
Last time I played in Reading Jesus christ when they turned the lights on it was like a hand grenade had been let off in Primark
''You have to hand it to my little cousin Beccy . She has no arms''
@dragonjones Hi I’m Andy. Dragons Den Idea 1 – I can exercise peoples pet hamsters while I’m DJ’ing. 33rpm brisk walk 45rpm jog 78rpm sprint about 9 hours ago via
New rule for Ram nights. No wet people. If your poor enough to get wet you can stay outside with the rest of the peasants.
@MissKatiePrice people don't boo you because you're in panto. They boo you because you're a cunt and your gash is like an otters pocket
@MissKatiePrice Hang junior,fill him full of sweets,hit him with a stick. Congratulations- you can now legally beat him he's a donkey pinata
@MissKatiePrice PAPS harassing you? Really? Well you do sell your fucking life to the media you fame hungry STD skip
@MissKatiePrice Walked past your house this morning. Is Harvey on a diet or something? The windows were fucking filthy.
@Alter_Ego_2010 make sure the tune is 173bpm before sending it. My PC is fucked due to all the grot I've been watchin on it.Send to Scott
@Alter_Ego_2010 If it's not 173bpm don't send it, I won't be able to mix it at any other speed. How can you not know who Scott is you chimp?
@JKCorden Happy Xmas to you. Ram party at Fabric next week, you’re welcome but we have no buffet. A fella outside sells hotdogs though
@JKCorden Knock Knock. Who's there? James Corden. Fuck off
@carlyjanewinter I've got a bet with GQ on what we could fit up your conk. I'm saying a Nokia 5210, he's saying 2 packs of Rowntrees Randoms
@djzinc the A to the N to the D to the Y to the C 'ANDY C' . Lost my Ska vip can you do me another I know a good mix with it that's all
@Noisia_nl Less handsex, more tunes
@subfocus Getting complaints that you've used the same kick and snare for 5 years. Can you get in contact with TC and borrow his drum kit?
@MissKatiePrice Why do you bother with a pink Range Rover? I have a broomstick here that you can fly about on and also beat Harvey with it
@MissKatiePrice B&Q have a spade sale at the moment, it's a dual purpose spade you can feed Harvey and then clean up his dirty ones with it
I've been mixing Turbulence into Valley of the Shadows for over 10 years and people still pay me 2k an hour. Idiots
@DJ_LIVELY Gym? you mean butchers
@MissKatiePrice how about you push Harvey off the pier and weigh him down with all the unsold copies of your dyslexic biography. You twat
I'm in Penzance at my grans. Loads of peasants bowling around with scuffed Lonsdale boxing shoes and haircuts so shit the dogs look stylish
"# Also I've come to a conclusion that dubstep sounds like the imagination of a 12 year old who has been fed candles and fireworks for lunch 03 December 2009 11:33:51 via web
@MissKatiePrice I hope your Xmas was shit and your horses get turned into glue. 29 December 2009 18:44:07 via web in reply to MissKatiePrice
If one more person tells me it's cold outside I'm gonna throw the book of 'Fucking obviously' at them. Cold? Really? Snow? Fuck off 07 January 2010 18:32:43 via web
I'm going to get a house cat and make it watch Avatar every morning so it assumes the outside world is full of blue people. 22 April 2010 02:55:15 via web
@MissKatiePrice Katie Come and pick your fucking spade up - he’s drinking out of the toilet again. Peter 21 July 2010 16:26:39 via web in reply to MissKatiePrice
MC Det just called "You need an MC at RAM?" Hmmm yeah probably if I was short of roid monkeys with shit haircuts and a speech impediment 30 November 2010 17:06:14 via web
Ram sold out at Fabric.100 tickets available at door, due to Red One we will let gingers in however you must be available to collect glasses 30 November 2010 17:30:26 via web
A bit sad I know but iv collected together the tweets i could find on the net and listed them below. Made me laugh again reading them.
"Can someone tell that roid monkey MC Det I want my Torchwood DVD Boxset back. He scratched the Stargate Universe collection I leant him.Tool
"I wouldn't buy a Dachshund. Their amusing sausage shape means they take 50% longer to stroke than other dogs, and time is money I'm Andy C"
"@FrictionShogun drumstep reminds me of a heavy ket session at Fabric, I was convinced the gateway to Narnia was below the monitor in room 1 "
"I just unlocked 3 new costumes for Ken on Super Street Fighter II Turbo, looks like that Turbulence Remix might be another few months."
@edrush need you to look after my facebook farm 2nite, crops need watering and there's a plough in the online shed. I'll give you 25 coins
To save on costly record sleeves I have started to glue records together that I don't play the B sides of. Thus creating a double A side.
@bassmentdnb Nice one, it was a good gig even if it did remind me of an episode of Fun House directed by David Lynch.
Merry Xmas to all my fans, also I will be increasing my DJ fee's by 2.5% in line with the planned VAT increase.
Listenin to that Breakage bit again. I got it wrong earlier, it sounds more like a Labrador with hooves dancing on a wave stricken boat
Looking forward to Fabric on 27th, always like playing there nice mix of people it's like Takeshi's Castle if it was filmed in Hackney
a pencil stabbed into a lump of blu tac makes an ideal holder for polo mints durin hectic gigs. Leaves a hand free for rewinds, salutes etc
@dragonjones dragons den idea 2 - 'Cash in the Addict' you give me a van and I drive about shaking the homeless down for any cash they have
@timwestwood maintain being 'down with the kids' by adopting a Simon Cowell haircut
@MissKatiePrice are you still with Alex? you always seem to be photographed with Gary Coleman that's all
@MCDET The Real Hustle is on BBC later, get some tips for Xmas
" Also giving away 75 signed copies of Nightlife 5 and an old pair of slippers Jeff reckons he made Turbulence in. Size 6 "
@kasracritical Nick & Gav just sent me a tune that sounds like a car alarm going off at an ADHD convention. You want it? Not up to Ram spec
I went to my first dyslexic rave last night. Everyone was taking F's and a bloke in the corner was trying to inject a Heron.
email info@shogunaudio as to why im a better dj then friction
friction -LOL People have been emailing the Shogun office with their 50 word explanation as to why Andy is a better DJ than me. Ill get my coat!
@Jaydandnb Jeff just made a tune that sounds like wasted but with drums that sound like a horse wearing ski's being kicked down a lift shaft
Just sent the Nightlife 5 winners their download codes . I'd like to thank the pirate bay for hosting and user bryangee001 for best seeder
I think I've totally ruined Rams sound by letting Gav & Nick release stuff that sounds like Commix having a migraine.
"@FrictionShogun we should have a B2B mix soon. You do the blending, I'll bounce about and take all the credit and charge a bit more then you"
At festivals I hang my record box in a tree and fill it full of water so it can be used as a nest for migrating sea birds
When I have gigs in earthquake prone countries I always DJ with a dog biscuit in my pocket so the rescue hounds find me 1st in an emergency
You know why women never produce? They don't know how to use reason or logic.
And fair play to Ed Rush, hasn't sold out and diluted the Virus sound. I have more money then him though, and that's what matters
"If anyone can lend me a Space Marine Terminator Squad & Ork Warboss with Attack Squig you'll have guest list for 4 at the next RAM night"
"@HighRankin You could come into the RAM clan in a heavy support role. Buy yourself a Chaos Space Marine Obliterator & Thunderfire Cannon"
"Just seen a new dubstep live act made up of a horse cantering on a snare drum, a downie kicking a skip and Katy B singing up a chimney"
Bit of a kerfuffle at my house, Nicks gobbed off to Guy Commix saying he looks like a shit Andy Murray working at Dixons.
Mrs is complaining saying she will not share the same bed as "me and my smelly bum." Well, I don't like him sleeping on the streets
I like my coffee like I like my woman: I don't like coffee.
Just sampling a spastic kicking a bin lid. Sub Focus needs a new kick drum, this will do
Last time I played in Reading Jesus christ when they turned the lights on it was like a hand grenade had been let off in Primark
''You have to hand it to my little cousin Beccy . She has no arms''
@dragonjones Hi I’m Andy. Dragons Den Idea 1 – I can exercise peoples pet hamsters while I’m DJ’ing. 33rpm brisk walk 45rpm jog 78rpm sprint about 9 hours ago via
New rule for Ram nights. No wet people. If your poor enough to get wet you can stay outside with the rest of the peasants.
@MissKatiePrice people don't boo you because you're in panto. They boo you because you're a cunt and your gash is like an otters pocket
@MissKatiePrice Hang junior,fill him full of sweets,hit him with a stick. Congratulations- you can now legally beat him he's a donkey pinata
@MissKatiePrice PAPS harassing you? Really? Well you do sell your fucking life to the media you fame hungry STD skip
@MissKatiePrice Walked past your house this morning. Is Harvey on a diet or something? The windows were fucking filthy.
@Alter_Ego_2010 make sure the tune is 173bpm before sending it. My PC is fucked due to all the grot I've been watchin on it.Send to Scott
@Alter_Ego_2010 If it's not 173bpm don't send it, I won't be able to mix it at any other speed. How can you not know who Scott is you chimp?
@JKCorden Happy Xmas to you. Ram party at Fabric next week, you’re welcome but we have no buffet. A fella outside sells hotdogs though
@JKCorden Knock Knock. Who's there? James Corden. Fuck off
@carlyjanewinter I've got a bet with GQ on what we could fit up your conk. I'm saying a Nokia 5210, he's saying 2 packs of Rowntrees Randoms
@djzinc the A to the N to the D to the Y to the C 'ANDY C' . Lost my Ska vip can you do me another I know a good mix with it that's all
@Noisia_nl Less handsex, more tunes
@subfocus Getting complaints that you've used the same kick and snare for 5 years. Can you get in contact with TC and borrow his drum kit?
@MissKatiePrice Why do you bother with a pink Range Rover? I have a broomstick here that you can fly about on and also beat Harvey with it
@MissKatiePrice B&Q have a spade sale at the moment, it's a dual purpose spade you can feed Harvey and then clean up his dirty ones with it
I've been mixing Turbulence into Valley of the Shadows for over 10 years and people still pay me 2k an hour. Idiots
@DJ_LIVELY Gym? you mean butchers
@MissKatiePrice how about you push Harvey off the pier and weigh him down with all the unsold copies of your dyslexic biography. You twat
I'm in Penzance at my grans. Loads of peasants bowling around with scuffed Lonsdale boxing shoes and haircuts so shit the dogs look stylish
"# Also I've come to a conclusion that dubstep sounds like the imagination of a 12 year old who has been fed candles and fireworks for lunch 03 December 2009 11:33:51 via web
@MissKatiePrice I hope your Xmas was shit and your horses get turned into glue. 29 December 2009 18:44:07 via web in reply to MissKatiePrice
If one more person tells me it's cold outside I'm gonna throw the book of 'Fucking obviously' at them. Cold? Really? Snow? Fuck off 07 January 2010 18:32:43 via web
I'm going to get a house cat and make it watch Avatar every morning so it assumes the outside world is full of blue people. 22 April 2010 02:55:15 via web
@MissKatiePrice Katie Come and pick your fucking spade up - he’s drinking out of the toilet again. Peter 21 July 2010 16:26:39 via web in reply to MissKatiePrice
MC Det just called "You need an MC at RAM?" Hmmm yeah probably if I was short of roid monkeys with shit haircuts and a speech impediment 30 November 2010 17:06:14 via web
Ram sold out at Fabric.100 tickets available at door, due to Red One we will let gingers in however you must be available to collect glasses 30 November 2010 17:30:26 via web
Last edited by a moderator:
And some more ....
Some strange noises coming from my neighbours house. I’ll leave soon it’s fairly uncomfortable hiding in his cloak room 01 December 2010 10:53:16 via web
Just got to Fabio's. No one is answering the door, he does live with a family of otters doesn't he? Regretting dropping that ket now , help! 01 December 2010 20:24:06 via Twitter for iPhone
Just finished painting my 'Chaos Space Marine Terminator'. Battle with Sub Focus later in the Imperial Sector, Warhammer 40,000 FTW 07 December 2010 14:20:50 via web
Frictions Hairdresser? You wouldn't think a haircut styled on the mental illness of a Xmas tree could make him look more of cunt, bravo! 07 December 2010 14:27:36 via web
# @MissKatiePrice Hang junior,fill him full of sweets,hit him with a stick. Congratulations- you can now legally beat him he's a donkey pinata 08 December 2010 17:52:06 via web
Like all people my age. I'm 34 11 December 2010 21:19:53 via Twitter for iPhone
I've decided on my new years resolution. It's going to be 1024×768 14 December 2010 09:04:06 via web
@sigmahq if you don't sort me an Andy VIP of cylon you're not welcome at my next BBQ. Remember how good Scotts burgers were? Toasted bun! 14 December 2010 21:41:07 via Twitter for iPhone in reply to sigmahq
It's difficult touring abroad especially showering. Sometimes I just sellotape my face up and peel off the dirt after a gig. 15 December 2010 12:48:58 via web
ordinary people can make themselves feel more important by carrying a bugle everywhere they go and sounding it before they enter the room 15 December 2010 17:23:18 via web
Just writing a letter of complaint to my local council about the state of the play park. I nearly broke my neck on the swing earlier 16 December 2010 11:59:49 via web
# Just in the studio with TC, he smells like a rotting beef carcass. He reminds me of a tubby version of Mark Wright from 'This Is Essex' 16 December 2010 16:10:53 via web
Can someone tell that roid monkey MC Det I want my Torchwood DVD Boxset back. He scratched the Stargate Universe collection I leant him.Tool 16 December 2010 18:18:20 via web
# I don't give a shit what Scott thinks. If I want to wear my 'Executioner' boxers gown to the gig I will. Knobhead 17 December 2010 20:46:53 via Twitter for iPhone"
@subfocus Getting complaints that you've used the same kick and snare for 5 years. Can you get in contact with TC and borrow his drum kit?
"Bio: If it's making a noise and coming from your garden it's me outside investigating the maintenance of your rose bush and related wooden fencing"
spent the last 3 hours painting my army of Feral Orks. Now Sub is telling me I've used an incorrect shade of blue. ****er
What's the difference between a dwarf and a 5 year old? From behind, not a lot. I best leave I can see the teachers staring at me
I've never been fined 4 talking on a mobile while driving.I just pop my mobile in a large shell so the police think I'm listening to the sea
If I want to take a kettle to a water fight I will. Last time I baby sit the little prick is crying her eyes out
Going home for a soapy tit wank. Without the soap and without the tits.
Avoid jet lag by simply taking an earlier flight, thus arriving fully refreshed and on time.
@linkcontrast get a haircut you look like Alvin Stardust after he's had a nightmare in a charity shop
I'm thinking about sponsoring Hype to grow some hair. My vision of an Albanian Pee Wee Herman will be realised eventually
Just getting my hair cut and had a number 2. Person cutting my hair is livid, best leave it fucking reeks and I'm not cleaning it up
I'm not homophobic, I love my house!
Come on Sky News make my Xmas . "Katie Price has been shot dead outside her house in Brighton, only witness is baby Harvey and he is blind"
Note to self - remove dog from box before stabbing it to make air holes
ordinary people can make themselves feel more important by carrying a bugle everywhere they go and sounding it before they enter the room
@tesco cashiers. Do I want a carrier bag? No, I've got 17 individual items I'd rather carry awkwardly and drop outside you fucking parrot
Just had fantastic sex with my girlfriend and Jeff. Only joking, I don't have a girlfriend.
@timwestwood maintain being 'down with the kids' by adopting a Simon Cowell haircut
Just about to send Original Sins Xmas card. Not sure of his address I've just put 'Northerner with curtains and dishwasher' that'll find him
Scotts just walked in on me wanking the dog. Apparently the text said 'walk'........... He enjoyed it, that's the main thing.
New rule for Ram Nights, no one with a BMI over 22 allowed in. I fucking hate fat people and I'm fed up with seeing them huffing & puffing
"Now that doesn't look like a foot" Thought the sock.
Isn't it strange how my Mrs always seems to have just finished cutting up some onions whenever we have visitors at the house
Jeff's in the studio wearing an old pair of slippers he reckons he made Turbulence in. He can't even load up Logic at the moment, idiot
Every time it hammers down with rain my gran just stands there staring through the window. I should let her in really she looks drenched
They say a womans work is never done. And that is why they are paid less.
"where the magic never ends" @alton_towers yet I'm stood outside wearing my Nemesis hoody at 9.15pm and you're shut? Fine, I'll wait. Pricks
I'm never wrong... I thought I was wrong once but it turns out I was mistaken...
"up since 9am practising for the RAM Streetfighter 4 day. Getting fed up with Jeff he's unbeatable with Ken. Prick should make some tunes"
Got Bassman kipling on my sofa, he has lent me the 24 season 7 box set. For some reason I really want to tickle his feet, must resist
Just had a photo with Original Sin. He makes the photo look skanky, I'm gonna get Futurebound in the shot to make the geordie look posh
@ vegetarians, instead of eating a tiny bit of a cow, eat a whole village of prawns, you genocidal maniacs#
Mrs not happy I made her cry when I was having sex. Shouldn't have rang her up really, what am I like.
Just listenin 2 Scott mix,sounds like someone having a nightmare on a building site. And you wonder why he does telesales during the day?
"Nothing makes me put my cock away faster than the sound of Jeffs car coming up the driveway."
"It's no secret I like to gamble. Just sent a £50 note in an envelope via royal mail addressed to myself."
"Pretend to be Welsh by wearing shit clothes, putting coal dust behind your ears, talking gibberish and singing all the time."
"Please sort the level of gash out on page 3,really struggling to knock one out over Lara from Reading,her boss eye put me off"
"@MickeyFinnIrl You come down to RAM with some old school and your staying outside in the rain with the rest of the student tramps"
"To make a pot of supermarket coleslaw go further, simply grate a carrot, some cabbage and an onion into the tub, then add some mayonnaise."
"Outside a school, just kicked over their Snowman. Getting some funny looks from the teachers, will come back later wearing a hat I think"
"Just ate a blackberry. Nick won't be happy it's not insured & he's expecting some emails from Argos about some Deck Chairs that he ordered"
No matter where I aim the tip some always goes in my belly button
'How do I like my girls? Well I like my girls like I like my whisky. 16 years old and mixed with coke '
'@SUBFOCUS Wake up I'm outside, I can already smell the stench of handsex seeping from your room. We have The Temple Of Skulls to paint today '
nothing against ed, he's a better dj, i just hold a grudge from when he beat me on tekken 2 with a rapid fire controller
You know you're planning a marathon wanking session when you leave a series of glasses behind doors to alert you of intruders
Nothing says ' I'm a dole sponging waste of the gene pool and I shop at Farm Foods ' like a scuffed pair of Reebok classics.
Single Twix wrappers carefully cut at the end make ideal individual finger warmers. For the thumb I advise a Penguin or Club biscuit wrapper
Idea 4@dragonjones my big fat gypsy wedding is on now. Why not fence them in & starve them then film a new show called 'hungry hungry gypos'"
sat in front of Logic, it's not really happening . Sort of hoping if I spaz out and mash the keyboard I'll end up with Bodyrock . Fucks sake
If I had a pound for every time someone called me stupid, I'd have £3.75
Just got Gold Trophy on Nurburgring AMG challenge. Red One couldn’t even get bronze the lumbering copper knobbed Simply Red lookalike
Now on to Jeremy Kyle, what the fuck does Graham do backstage? I reckon he feeds them full of ket and plays them Clarkee from Dreamscape 23
People are staring. I thought it might be because I'm Andy C but security just pointed out you need to wear trousers in Lakeside
Just had an epic dump,smells like a cross between vanessa feltz laundry basket and nigella lawsons bed sheets,Damn those child proof windows
You have to give it to short people. It's hard for them to reach things
@ wikileaks - if you like leaks so much, can you come and fix my washing machine, you white haired cunt
@hypehypehype allright Kev, sorry about you walking in on me I know it must of been like looking into a butchers window
@djfreshdnb Your old man is having a fucking jolly if he thinks I’m paying £35 for some Langoustines on Ice.
Some strange noises coming from my neighbours house. I’ll leave soon it’s fairly uncomfortable hiding in his cloak room 01 December 2010 10:53:16 via web
Just got to Fabio's. No one is answering the door, he does live with a family of otters doesn't he? Regretting dropping that ket now , help! 01 December 2010 20:24:06 via Twitter for iPhone
Just finished painting my 'Chaos Space Marine Terminator'. Battle with Sub Focus later in the Imperial Sector, Warhammer 40,000 FTW 07 December 2010 14:20:50 via web
Frictions Hairdresser? You wouldn't think a haircut styled on the mental illness of a Xmas tree could make him look more of cunt, bravo! 07 December 2010 14:27:36 via web
# @MissKatiePrice Hang junior,fill him full of sweets,hit him with a stick. Congratulations- you can now legally beat him he's a donkey pinata 08 December 2010 17:52:06 via web
Like all people my age. I'm 34 11 December 2010 21:19:53 via Twitter for iPhone
I've decided on my new years resolution. It's going to be 1024×768 14 December 2010 09:04:06 via web
@sigmahq if you don't sort me an Andy VIP of cylon you're not welcome at my next BBQ. Remember how good Scotts burgers were? Toasted bun! 14 December 2010 21:41:07 via Twitter for iPhone in reply to sigmahq
It's difficult touring abroad especially showering. Sometimes I just sellotape my face up and peel off the dirt after a gig. 15 December 2010 12:48:58 via web
ordinary people can make themselves feel more important by carrying a bugle everywhere they go and sounding it before they enter the room 15 December 2010 17:23:18 via web
Just writing a letter of complaint to my local council about the state of the play park. I nearly broke my neck on the swing earlier 16 December 2010 11:59:49 via web
# Just in the studio with TC, he smells like a rotting beef carcass. He reminds me of a tubby version of Mark Wright from 'This Is Essex' 16 December 2010 16:10:53 via web
Can someone tell that roid monkey MC Det I want my Torchwood DVD Boxset back. He scratched the Stargate Universe collection I leant him.Tool 16 December 2010 18:18:20 via web
# I don't give a shit what Scott thinks. If I want to wear my 'Executioner' boxers gown to the gig I will. Knobhead 17 December 2010 20:46:53 via Twitter for iPhone"
@subfocus Getting complaints that you've used the same kick and snare for 5 years. Can you get in contact with TC and borrow his drum kit?
"Bio: If it's making a noise and coming from your garden it's me outside investigating the maintenance of your rose bush and related wooden fencing"
spent the last 3 hours painting my army of Feral Orks. Now Sub is telling me I've used an incorrect shade of blue. ****er
What's the difference between a dwarf and a 5 year old? From behind, not a lot. I best leave I can see the teachers staring at me
I've never been fined 4 talking on a mobile while driving.I just pop my mobile in a large shell so the police think I'm listening to the sea
If I want to take a kettle to a water fight I will. Last time I baby sit the little prick is crying her eyes out
Going home for a soapy tit wank. Without the soap and without the tits.
Avoid jet lag by simply taking an earlier flight, thus arriving fully refreshed and on time.
@linkcontrast get a haircut you look like Alvin Stardust after he's had a nightmare in a charity shop
I'm thinking about sponsoring Hype to grow some hair. My vision of an Albanian Pee Wee Herman will be realised eventually
Just getting my hair cut and had a number 2. Person cutting my hair is livid, best leave it fucking reeks and I'm not cleaning it up
I'm not homophobic, I love my house!
Come on Sky News make my Xmas . "Katie Price has been shot dead outside her house in Brighton, only witness is baby Harvey and he is blind"
Note to self - remove dog from box before stabbing it to make air holes
ordinary people can make themselves feel more important by carrying a bugle everywhere they go and sounding it before they enter the room
@tesco cashiers. Do I want a carrier bag? No, I've got 17 individual items I'd rather carry awkwardly and drop outside you fucking parrot
Just had fantastic sex with my girlfriend and Jeff. Only joking, I don't have a girlfriend.
@timwestwood maintain being 'down with the kids' by adopting a Simon Cowell haircut
Just about to send Original Sins Xmas card. Not sure of his address I've just put 'Northerner with curtains and dishwasher' that'll find him
Scotts just walked in on me wanking the dog. Apparently the text said 'walk'........... He enjoyed it, that's the main thing.
New rule for Ram Nights, no one with a BMI over 22 allowed in. I fucking hate fat people and I'm fed up with seeing them huffing & puffing
"Now that doesn't look like a foot" Thought the sock.
Isn't it strange how my Mrs always seems to have just finished cutting up some onions whenever we have visitors at the house
Jeff's in the studio wearing an old pair of slippers he reckons he made Turbulence in. He can't even load up Logic at the moment, idiot
Every time it hammers down with rain my gran just stands there staring through the window. I should let her in really she looks drenched
They say a womans work is never done. And that is why they are paid less.
"where the magic never ends" @alton_towers yet I'm stood outside wearing my Nemesis hoody at 9.15pm and you're shut? Fine, I'll wait. Pricks
I'm never wrong... I thought I was wrong once but it turns out I was mistaken...
"up since 9am practising for the RAM Streetfighter 4 day. Getting fed up with Jeff he's unbeatable with Ken. Prick should make some tunes"
Got Bassman kipling on my sofa, he has lent me the 24 season 7 box set. For some reason I really want to tickle his feet, must resist
Just had a photo with Original Sin. He makes the photo look skanky, I'm gonna get Futurebound in the shot to make the geordie look posh
@ vegetarians, instead of eating a tiny bit of a cow, eat a whole village of prawns, you genocidal maniacs#
Mrs not happy I made her cry when I was having sex. Shouldn't have rang her up really, what am I like.
Just listenin 2 Scott mix,sounds like someone having a nightmare on a building site. And you wonder why he does telesales during the day?
"Nothing makes me put my cock away faster than the sound of Jeffs car coming up the driveway."
"It's no secret I like to gamble. Just sent a £50 note in an envelope via royal mail addressed to myself."
"Pretend to be Welsh by wearing shit clothes, putting coal dust behind your ears, talking gibberish and singing all the time."
"Please sort the level of gash out on page 3,really struggling to knock one out over Lara from Reading,her boss eye put me off"
"@MickeyFinnIrl You come down to RAM with some old school and your staying outside in the rain with the rest of the student tramps"
"To make a pot of supermarket coleslaw go further, simply grate a carrot, some cabbage and an onion into the tub, then add some mayonnaise."
"Outside a school, just kicked over their Snowman. Getting some funny looks from the teachers, will come back later wearing a hat I think"
"Just ate a blackberry. Nick won't be happy it's not insured & he's expecting some emails from Argos about some Deck Chairs that he ordered"
No matter where I aim the tip some always goes in my belly button
'How do I like my girls? Well I like my girls like I like my whisky. 16 years old and mixed with coke '
'@SUBFOCUS Wake up I'm outside, I can already smell the stench of handsex seeping from your room. We have The Temple Of Skulls to paint today '
nothing against ed, he's a better dj, i just hold a grudge from when he beat me on tekken 2 with a rapid fire controller
You know you're planning a marathon wanking session when you leave a series of glasses behind doors to alert you of intruders
Nothing says ' I'm a dole sponging waste of the gene pool and I shop at Farm Foods ' like a scuffed pair of Reebok classics.
Single Twix wrappers carefully cut at the end make ideal individual finger warmers. For the thumb I advise a Penguin or Club biscuit wrapper
Idea 4@dragonjones my big fat gypsy wedding is on now. Why not fence them in & starve them then film a new show called 'hungry hungry gypos'"
sat in front of Logic, it's not really happening . Sort of hoping if I spaz out and mash the keyboard I'll end up with Bodyrock . Fucks sake
If I had a pound for every time someone called me stupid, I'd have £3.75
Just got Gold Trophy on Nurburgring AMG challenge. Red One couldn’t even get bronze the lumbering copper knobbed Simply Red lookalike
Now on to Jeremy Kyle, what the fuck does Graham do backstage? I reckon he feeds them full of ket and plays them Clarkee from Dreamscape 23
People are staring. I thought it might be because I'm Andy C but security just pointed out you need to wear trousers in Lakeside
Just had an epic dump,smells like a cross between vanessa feltz laundry basket and nigella lawsons bed sheets,Damn those child proof windows
You have to give it to short people. It's hard for them to reach things
@ wikileaks - if you like leaks so much, can you come and fix my washing machine, you white haired cunt
@hypehypehype allright Kev, sorry about you walking in on me I know it must of been like looking into a butchers window
@djfreshdnb Your old man is having a fucking jolly if he thinks I’m paying £35 for some Langoustines on Ice.
the katie price ones are fucking hysterical, twitter is definitely a lot worse off without fake andy c
@MissKatiePrice people don't boo you because you're in panto. They boo you because you're a cunt and your gash is like an otters pocket
@MissKatiePrice people don't boo you because you're in panto. They boo you because you're a cunt and your gash is like an otters pocket
D
dirty breaks
Guest
Just getting my hair cut and had a number 2. Person cutting my hair is livid, best leave it fucking reeks and I'm not cleaning it up
Hello people
Thanks for keeping this thread running, I was the person in question making out Andy was slightly mental.
TBH it was well received, Twitter DnB heads take themselves far too seriously so I think this parody account was needed at the time.
I only carried on tweeting for the 1% who followed me thinking it was the real Andy. Me and my mates were honestly in tears sometimes at some of the tweets we got back. I liked to believe that there were lots of people who honestly thought Andy spent his spare time painting Space Marines and battling armies of Orks with Scott & Jeff and eating tube after tube of Jaffa Cakes.
My personal fave was blagging Zane Lowe that Andy wanted to do a 20 min mix on his show using 6 (fucking 6) decks.
The reason it got taken down was an absolute classic, I had some really gullible Andy fan sending me tweets about how much he couldn't wait to see me play an 'Alive' gig in Sheffield. Gave the guy a few tweets to hook him in, the day of said gig he tweeted me again so I went on a bit of a wind up. Basically told the guy if he was part of 'Andy's special club' he could come and meet me backstage, to do this I told him to wander up to security and say he was in Andy's club with the password of 'jaffa' so they know he's allowed backstage.
Cue the next day, matey sending me tweets saying he went to security and they had no idea what the fuck he was on about and just laughed at him. He got proper annoyed when he found out I was the fake Andy and he said he was going to report me, next day the Twitter account was deleted.
I think the account went out on a high, I had over 10k followers and I was getting a bit bored so glad it ended in all honesty.
Thanks all it was a laugh wasn't it.
Thanks for keeping this thread running, I was the person in question making out Andy was slightly mental.
TBH it was well received, Twitter DnB heads take themselves far too seriously so I think this parody account was needed at the time.
I only carried on tweeting for the 1% who followed me thinking it was the real Andy. Me and my mates were honestly in tears sometimes at some of the tweets we got back. I liked to believe that there were lots of people who honestly thought Andy spent his spare time painting Space Marines and battling armies of Orks with Scott & Jeff and eating tube after tube of Jaffa Cakes.
My personal fave was blagging Zane Lowe that Andy wanted to do a 20 min mix on his show using 6 (fucking 6) decks.
The reason it got taken down was an absolute classic, I had some really gullible Andy fan sending me tweets about how much he couldn't wait to see me play an 'Alive' gig in Sheffield. Gave the guy a few tweets to hook him in, the day of said gig he tweeted me again so I went on a bit of a wind up. Basically told the guy if he was part of 'Andy's special club' he could come and meet me backstage, to do this I told him to wander up to security and say he was in Andy's club with the password of 'jaffa' so they know he's allowed backstage.
Cue the next day, matey sending me tweets saying he went to security and they had no idea what the fuck he was on about and just laughed at him. He got proper annoyed when he found out I was the fake Andy and he said he was going to report me, next day the Twitter account was deleted.
I think the account went out on a high, I had over 10k followers and I was getting a bit bored so glad it ended in all honesty.
Thanks all it was a laugh wasn't it.
Last edited:
- Joined
- Mar 8, 2008
- Location
- London/Southampton
lmao you legend, sad to see its gone :<
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2007
- Location
- Petts Wood
Its things like this that make the internet amazing.
If anyone has a copy of the Andy double drop boots I designed I'd appreciate someone posting them, can't remember the other things I'd done I think it was a coffee mug, a truckers cap and a pair of summer deck shoes.
Looking back on it I think my Andy products had great potential. I could of built Andy into a brand that dominated the dance tents by selling this shite for £20 a pop to gurned up shit for brain students at festivals
Looking back on it I think my Andy products had great potential. I could of built Andy into a brand that dominated the dance tents by selling this shite for £20 a pop to gurned up shit for brain students at festivals
hit em high
Member
- Joined
- Jul 21, 2011
your an opinionated person arent you
- Joined
- Feb 13, 2011
- Location
- bristol/birmingham
who doesnt have an opinion?
**you're
cptunicorn
Member
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2011
don't forget **aren't, you attention seeking grammar whore!
- Joined
- Sep 7, 2011
- Location
- SW London
legend
Longboa
Member
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2011
- Location
- Auckland, NZ
classic
