DnB Dan J - CAN'T HOLD IT - FINISHED

[Dan JJJJJJ]

 

[Dan JJJJJJ]

.

 

[Bart Barnes]

Yes

I like the pads in the intro and the instuments in general. I think the bass comes in too early for mixing purposes and you could have the intro over 48 or 64 bars because the musical elements you have are nice and they can be good in the mix but you might not be going for that so whatever.

I like the pitched up can't hold it vocal but is it panned left? the other vocal is coming from the other side so I guess this is on purpose but I think it would sound better if they were both centred but widened or ping pong left and right. I don't like the other vocal as much it sounds like it is straight from a sample pack and it would give more vibes if you sampled an old motown acapella. if it is a generic 'yeah' then no one will be able to get you for copyright and you just tell the label it is your own sample.

The drums sound nice. It could be my ears but the sub sounds a bit on the left. It would be nice if the sub had a bit of a high or high mid end presence even just slightly which you could automate for a bit of movement.

The stutter effect on the snare is nice but it loses impact because it is the same all the time. The amen is the same it is nice when it comes in but there should be more variation. Maybe if you had a longer intro you could save the amens for the second drop.

A few higher notes or some portamento in the bassline would be nice or you could have more progression with the bass notes by keeping it sparse when it drops because you have music throughout then add more notes in and then the second drop with amen and full bassline.

 

[Dan JJJJJJ]

Many thanks for your really helpful comments Bart. You've really made me think about rearranging it so the amen can come in as more of a "2nd drop" and to also hold out on the full bass till then. You're right, with the musical elements maybe it doesn't all need to come in so quickly.

I did deliberately pan the 2 different vocals left and right - maybe you are right that they would fit better down the middle. I find it hard finding vocal samples I can use effectively but I might get some old records out to see if I can find a similar "ooo" type thing, unless you have any suggestions?

The bass shouldn't have any pan - it's hard for me to tell cos my hearing is better in one ear than the other but there is nothing that should be making it pan. I might put a pitch up line underneath to see if that fills it out a bit.

Finally, yes I have been a bit lazy with editing the beats. I think they're good but you're right - needs a bit of variation.

I'll work on it all and update. Thanks again

 

[Dan JJJJJJ]

Updated the arrangement

 

[Bart Barnes]

Yes Dan

I think the vocals sound better now and the amen has more impact when it comes in. I think I noticed some subtle changes to the bassline and it sounds centred now but that might have been the case in the first place. Maybe some notes an octave up would be nice?

Still think the bass comes in too early - maybe drop it in at 48 bars or 64 because the intro would work better if the drums and nice musical elements you have build up and progress a bit and it would be better for mixing. The ending is a bit abrupt as well.

In each half of the song you could try 16 bars of just the drums (particularly when your amen comes in) and bass because while the musical elements you have are v nice they are constant throughout the track.

There are some nice sounds in your track which is the most difficult part and I think with a bit more structure and some editing of your drums you could have something real nice. Are you going to enter the forum compo?

 

[Dan JJJJJJ]

Hey Bart, thanks again for your kind and very helpful feedback. I took some of your advice but (foolishly) left other parts. I've updated the original post with the final version of the track. I hope you and other enjoy

 

[Dan JJJJJJ]

Upload corrected