cool story bro!

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by richie_stix, Oct 8, 2009.

  1. richie_stix

    richie_stix gomby plz

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2008
    Messages:
    9,512
    Likes Received:
    298
    Ad in New York Times...We need more "victims" like Alex!



    This Ad Was Posted to Craig in the Personals


    To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last. Date: 05-27-09, 1:43 A M EST.

    I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on my girlfriend, threatening our lives and me.

    You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings.

    I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.

    First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment when I drew my pistol after you took my Jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.

    My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 A CP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening.

    Obviously you agree that it is a very Intimidating weapon when pointed at your head wasn't it?

    I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from bare footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].

    After I called your mother, or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I Went and filled up my gas tank as well as four other people's in the gas station on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!

    I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go’s, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]

    I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.

    Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone.
    Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what's going on with that?

    Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).

    In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.

    Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.

    Have a good day!

    Thoughtfully yours,
    Alex
     
    ScottyEightSix likes this.
  2. Thin and crispy

    Thin and crispy Active Member

    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2009
    Messages:
    4,075
    Likes Received:
    19
    Location:
    Doncaster, United Kingdom
    its funny, but surely this alex guy is gonna get some shit from this, lol. threatening the president from a phonme that isnt yours isnt exactly smart =x
     
  3. Moskit

    Moskit :rodigan: Staff Member

    Joined:
    May 27, 2009
    Messages:
    4,368
    Likes Received:
    3,763
    FUCK YEAH!

    I'm grinning ear-to-ear like a Cheshire Cat.

    Fucking excellent.
     
  4. rob_del_terror

    rob_del_terror - ̿ ̿'̵͇̿̿з=(•̪●)=ε

    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2009
    Messages:
    4,039
    Likes Received:
    119
    Location:
    Blackpool, United Kingdom
  5. $marty

    $marty Dexcell Staff Member

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2003
    Messages:
    18,693
    Likes Received:
    1,928
    Location:
    Watford
    Thats a way to fuck over a crim! Big ups Alex!
     
  6. chanty

    chanty Active Member

    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2008
    Messages:
    2,149
    Likes Received:
    9
    Location:
    Bristol
    quality, went a bit far with the FBI phone calls but sick nonetheless
     
  7. ScottyEightSix

    ScottyEightSix HUGE EARS > COMEDY CHIN

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2007
    Messages:
    13,064
    Likes Received:
    623
    Location:
    CHINFORD
    Excellent man, that cheered me up
     
  8. Gloxxy

    Gloxxy I SNORT COAL

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2007
    Messages:
    6,160
    Likes Received:
    950
    Location:
    TUT' MINES
    So revenge is dish best served piping hot in this case.
     
  9. $marty

    $marty Dexcell Staff Member

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2003
    Messages:
    18,693
    Likes Received:
    1,928
    Location:
    Watford
    Or whilst wearing a black burberry jacket :teeth:
     
  10. moriaty

    moriaty Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2003
    Messages:
    4,464
    Likes Received:
    22
    Location:
    between a low hum and a high whine
    cold. me like. sometimes guns are good. (y)
     
  11. Joey AdhD

    Joey AdhD sweaty scouser

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2008
    Messages:
    7,158
    Likes Received:
    298
    Location:
    Liverpool, United Kingdom
  12. Nick-ep

    Nick-ep RudeFM/In-Reach

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2008
    Messages:
    2,064
    Likes Received:
    73
    Location:
    Watford
    Amazing revenge! Good man Alex
     
  13. richie_stix

    richie_stix gomby plz

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2008
    Messages:
    9,512
    Likes Received:
    298
    not sure on the authenticity of the story... it was in the NY times, but if it really happened... and what crim reads the times?