Chuck Norris would be proud

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by Naib, Sep 29, 2006.

  1. Naib

    Naib Member

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  2. Dustek

    Dustek Finished the PhD

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    The guy would falls on his face with the nunchuckas should be an emoticon for somebody trying to post a clever reply and failing...
     
  3. Fes Rock

    Fes Rock Nothing..........

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    Chuck noris sneezes lightning
     
  4. deadaelus

    deadaelus Laughter in the Slaughter

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    Chuck Norris does not sleep...He Waits.
     
  5. mesh

    mesh Active Member

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    :uberlaugh

    When Chuck Norris goes swimming he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norrised.

    When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

    Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

    Chuck Norris invented every colour. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

    When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

    Chuck Norris hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

    Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.

    Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

    Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.

    Chuck Norris's calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Chuck Norris.

    Chuck Norris can speak Braille.

    Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.

    Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pyjamas.

    Chuck Norris owns the greatest Poker Face of all-time. It helped him win the1983 World Series of Poker despite him holding just a Joker, a Get out
    of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game Uno.

    Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

    Chuck Norris doesn't pop his collar, his shirts just get erections when they touch his body.

    Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris's leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.

    Chuck Norris divides by zero.

    Chuck Norris is always on top during sex because Chuck Norris never f***s up.

    When Chuck Norris exercises, the machine gets stronger.

    Chuck Norris doesn't use pickup lines, he simply says, "Now."

    Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled drinking ability. Shortly after the transaction was
    finalized, Barry kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he
    should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

    Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

    Chuck Norris once had an erection while lying face down. He struck oil.

    Chuck Norris once devoured a whole wheel-barrow full of clay to prove to a friend that the expression "*****ting bricks" wasn't just a figure of
    speech.

    The only time Chuck Norris was wrong was when he thought he had made a mistake.
     
  6. Twisted Murderer

    Twisted Murderer Den Tammen Belg

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    [​IMG]
     
  7. Dustek

    Dustek Finished the PhD

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  8. sdm

    sdm This is Dog Fort

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    [​IMG]
     
  9. Time Dependant

    Time Dependant Jungle Hunter

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    haha I've seen this before it still makes me chuckle