Cheekiest Place you've had a knuckle shuffle ???

EWOKS

POTATOES GONNA POTATE
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#1
yh, completely HOMO thread...

wheres the cheekiest place youve manged to buff the rifle ? ... or closest to being caught ...

mines gotta be when i had a paper round, as a kid .. back in the day, we didnt have all this disposable internet porn at ure knuckles mercy ... it was strictly 2nd hand copies of Razzle from the 80's with pictures of women in with full on growlers ... anyway, seeing my opportunity as the local paperboy at 12/13 .. was delivering copies of the sun and the sport round some posh boy houses that circled round a park ..

one thing comes to another .. ( remember i cant put this off till i get home and go on the net .. there was no net porn ) .. so as you are, horny as fuck, a wee nipper .. with number 45s copy of the sun .. page 3 .... decide tp sneak a quick peak as i gaze down into my fluorescent bag of mischief and bollock yoghurt potential ..

shes a cracker ... 5 mins later im in the bush on the park, sat on a tree stump .. cock in my hand , paper open on the leaves, luminous yellow bag still over my shoulder.. shuffling away ..

next thing i know some little collie cunting dog runs into the bush .. i panic .. put my half jizzy wang back in my pants .. look uner the twigs and see the walker .. must of heard or seen the paper bag .. so i sneak out the other side .. turn round and hes stood watching me walk of putting the sun back in the paper bag all flushed and out of breath ... and a semi poking out me pants no doubt .. anyway .. went and posted the jizzy paper after still .. and went about my day ..

strangley enough, it was such a thrilling experience, and i thought if i can get away with it in that situation .. then its easy enough .. so i also cracked one out on the porch of someones house one day.. at 6 am sunday not many ppl about .. aslong as ure in no view of a window.. ure good to bash away ..

i was the notorious wanking paperboy
 
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Toejam

OOOBEY DOOBEY
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#2
chopper bike, 9 years old i was, circled an old peoples home allotment, watched Doris un-earthing a parsnip and busted a big nut HARD, reverse peodo wank, i was ahead of the game back then
 

Catsel

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#6
i wanted to started this thread!

i was stayin at this backpackers.. talkin to english girl online at bout 11pm here... shes masturbating.. any she goes to go on webcam. and something happens... its broken w/e.. so i ask her to finish off on thr phone... so i go outside with a lik spliff, and start listening to her moan n shit..

anyways there was a fence nearby so i pretended to hav a piss n just bashed one out in the bush.

which was nice.
 

logikz

I Am Not The King
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#7
not bad! mine is running through the corridors of my grandmothers flat with her in hot pursuit going 'kaaaaarl? kaaaa-aaarl? where has that boy gone off to now' i had to duck between rooms and hide behind coat racks, pants around knees akwardly hunched over jerking it the whole while.
 

_MILLA

Flamboyant muthafucka
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#8
YES!!! this thread is my kinda thread.. not in a gay way tho.. in a manly lad bro way
good one ethix.. being label'd the notorious wanking paper boy is funnier than being a sneezy wanker hahaha


my input on this thread is my towns public toilets that used to be used for cottaging / in the travel lodge with my mum in the next bed..

dont judge i was young and horny

and not much has changed
 

logikz

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#9
YES!!! this thread is my kinda thread.. not in a gay way tho.. in a manly lad bro way
good one ethix.. being label'd the notorious wanking paper boy is funnier than being a sneezy wanker hahaha


my input on this thread is my towns public toilets that used to be used for cottaging / in the travel lodge with my mum in the next bed..

dont judge i was young and horny

and not much has changed
wont judge milla. certainly not. this is well known homo thread. but im afraid i have to quote this, for posterity, you understand. haha im tempted to write omg. thrice.
 

t345e

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#11
Airport toilets. Got clocked by some Spanish security as I was in there for a suspiciously long time. I was mid-bash, solid wood.
 

Freek

Lets get freeeeeeky
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#12
this isnt me, this is a good mate of mine but its such an appropriate story for the thread...

He was off to Cuba with the family for 2 weeks of lazying around the pool in the sun and getting absolutely bladdered in the process.

On the loooong flight he feels the need to pop one out in the plane toilet. So apprently 2 minutes in someone has knocked on the door and asked if anyone was in there. In pure shock he jumps up, smacks his head on the overhead part cracked his skull open, was rushed to hospital when they landed was all bandaged up but was not allowed any alcohol or swimming for the entire holiday, hence holiday ruined lol!!!

So to make up for this, he told the flight company that he slipped on water on the bathroom floor which caused him to smack his head. he claimed several thousands of the insurance and got away with it loool! win!
 

richie_stix

gomby plz
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#17
in the travel lodge with my mum in the next bed..
done that myself... nowincest... except replace travel lodge with hotel on holiday

dont judge i was young and horny


and in a hedge on a country road on the way home from school

---------- Post added at 11:33 ---------- Previous post was at 11:32 ----------

he claimed several thousands of the insurance and got away with it loool! win!
hmm, perhaps i might have an 'accident' on my holiday
 

Salvus

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#19
I worked for sainsburys a good few years back. They were building a new store and me and this bird were sort of acting as security on a front desk before opening day (just us in the store).
She was just so damn fit. I went upstairs and polished one off in the staff area. Haha. Came down feeling like the big man.
 

$pyto

NEW DAWN
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#20
At school, bunking off from lessons in the 6th Form toilets (always empty). Probs a couple of times lol

Plus at the first place I worked when I was 18-20. And at my current job lol. For some reason, if I have a massive booze up during the week and a dry night, then the next day I am RAGIN
 
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