Bartender woes

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by osmosis, Nov 20, 2011.

  1. osmosis

    osmosis Member

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    Lads please fill me with your infinite knowledge.

    I'm out Friday night getting a drink at a club only got £2 so I beg the bartender for a drink she nicely gave me a vodka redbull but then she gave me back a quid and gave me a wink, I was feeling sweet so started talking to her and eventually got her number.

    trust me this girl is fine :') so I don't want to cock it up. I've left it a day and I now I don't know what to text her, do I ask her for a drink or waat? I'm just a youngin I'm out of my depth :teeth:

    Please crack some Lols but some real answers would be good as I don't want to leave her to long.
     
  2. Kenneth4Eva

    Kenneth4Eva Let's Breed

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    take her to mac donalds older chicks love mac donalds
     
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  3. Balthazaar

    Balthazaar Member

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    Wait 2-3 days and then call her,don't call her immediately you will leave impression that you are desperate.Learn some funny,but sexy jokes and fill her up so she relaxes and prepared for.. ..something..Took her to your flat,but before u do that put some porn in dvd,so when u there pour some drink and turn on tv and accidentally turn on porn and then act like you cant turn off because your remote is broken.Enjoy...I this doesn't work then,pretend that u you have stroke and tell her the only way she can help is to massage and suck your c..k....xD
     
  4. Kenneth4Eva

    Kenneth4Eva Let's Breed

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    WHAT EVER YOU DO...DONT TELL HER YOUR REAL AGE!
     
  5. dirty breaks

    dirty breaks Guest

    how old is she?
     
  6. JHSE23

    JHSE23 the yen

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    many lols shall be cracked
     
  7. dnbkingz

    dnbkingz bollocks

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    stick a finger up her....nevermind.
     
  8. EWOKS

    EWOKS POTATOES GONNA POTATE

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    see revtech fighting tips thread, for ways to wressle the growler , pon evening
     
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  9. MARKLAR

    MARKLAR International Tracksuit Salesman

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    surely at least 18 if working in a bar

    on another note why the fuck did u head to a club with 2 quid?lol
     
  10. dirty breaks

    dirty breaks Guest

    what if her poonarni resembles Madonna's hairy growler, or is like demi Moore's vajoon and is a bush beyond all belief? be prepared for a hairy muff...
     
  11. jsmith89

    jsmith89 Hmph..... silly...

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    dont tell her your age

    say crack again...

    god im lame
     
  12. EWOKS

    EWOKS POTATOES GONNA POTATE

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    how ya know demi moores get a bushy wound ?
     
  13. Sweaty Teddy

    Sweaty Teddy Nob'ed

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    You using a fake ID to get into clubs or you just look older? I ask because what if you do end up meeting up with her and she suggests that you go have a few drinks somewhere, if you don't have any ID going out with her could be awkward if you get rejected from most of the places you try going into, on the other hand if you do have a fake ID theres a chance that she might at one stage ask to have a look at it to have a chuckle at the photo (anyone else ever get that from people?) and then if you've told her your real name and not your fake ID name shes gonna be like "hold on who the fuck is this, who the fuck are you?!?" and then she'll either sketch out and run away upon realistion that she was briefly considering intercourse with a 16 year old boy or it'll go the complete other way and if that is the case then you're onto a winner my son.
     
  14. ThePapa

    ThePapa Suffragette City..

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    I hope for the sake of this thread she's forty.
     
  15. Toejam

    Toejam OOOBEY DOOBEY

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    She gave you a cheap drink which probably has been sat behind the bar all night, the number you got is prolly her fat freind who is scared of daylight and knits to forget.

    Prove us wrong, or we will not be happy.
     
  16. dirty breaks

    dirty breaks Guest

    saw the pic and nearly chundered, Google it. It's like someone stapled a cat to her poon.
     
  17. EWOKS

    EWOKS POTATOES GONNA POTATE

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    hahah hahaha hahaha ace . i hope its real
     
  18. dirty breaks

    dirty breaks Guest

    I think it is real... I dunno, she's single now and she likes a younger man so I'm clearly in with a chance of smashing her pasty. if I manage to get a chance at wrecking her love-box then I'll take pictures as definitive proof and to sell as souvenirs. :2thumbs:
     
  19. SIRUS

    SIRUS 変なひと

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    Ask her what her favourite hair conditioner is and whatver she replies just text her back with 'roflcopter i use dat 2'.

    Maybe send her a picture of a you topless holding a sword.
     
  20. EWOKS

    EWOKS POTATOES GONNA POTATE

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    pork sword ftwcoptor

    ---------- Post added at 03:11 ---------- Previous post was at 03:09 ----------

    ure just taking this convo, as an excuse to call the spam purse as many different names as you can think of arent you, you little fur burger , cummon you little pink tacco , hahaha .. ure such a sausage wallet you really are