Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear. Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a necessary condition for the joke to exist. A man walks into a bar.... He is an alcoholic and its destroying his family.... How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor? Your mum is so fat that when she dives into a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water than people with less body mass. Knock knock. who's there? it's the police, your family has died in a terrible accident. A man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he develops an epidural haematoma due to the blunt impact, and despite the best efforts of doctors, dies the next day. He had a wife and two children, with a third on the way. How many kangaroos does it take to fix a leaky water pipe? None, a kangaroo has neither the intelligence nor dexterity to do any kind of plumbing work. A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park. What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, as an object that is red all over does not have the capacity to also be black and white, unless we are taking shades of red under consideration, in which case you could take parts of the red qualities of the object in question and take them to the polar extremes of the visible spectrum, hence fulfilling the condition of being red, black and white. A horse walks into a bar The barman asks, "hey horse, why the long face?" To which the horse replies, "I've just been diagnosed with cancer."