Accidents at work

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by Mr Fletch, Jan 10, 2012.

  1. Mr Fletch

    Mr Fletch aka KRONIX

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    Being a chef, I'm used to the odd cut, and burn, it comes with the territory. But today I went one step further, and successfully managed to slice the tip of my left index finger clean off, from about halfway down the nail!
    Fuck knows where the tip went (probably in some poor sods food), anyway, they couldnt stitch it as there was nothing there to stitch, so it's all bandaged good and proper, and stings like a bitch!

    So, I'm wondering, what sort of stupid accidents have you guys ever had in the workplace?
     
  2. hyperd4eva

    hyperd4eva H&M SCARVES

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    once mowed someones lawn when i was an apprentice landscaping.. over filled the mower with oil and when i had finished i realised id turned the whole lawn black!
     
  3. jmzmaloney

    jmzmaloney ENTHUSED WITH ETHNOGRAPHIC PLUNDERPHONICS Staff Member

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    Nearly got nocked out by a potato, stupid electronic door wouldnt open quick enough, tried to do an Indiana Jones roll under the door, guy was trying to hit me in the leg, but the Indy roll put me in the firing line. Quite a few vegetable injuries. Funniest thing I ever saw was a guy lying underneath a whole cage of loose potatoes after catching a hole, walked out into the back corridor, there he was with a cage and 2000 kilos of potatoes on top of him.

    ---------- Post added at 15:55 ---------- Previous post was at 15:49 ----------

    Fuck I've got lots of stories from work theyre coming back to me, another funny one was a guy was trying to adjust a shelf of wine, had half his body underneath the shelf, the shelf collapsed and knocked him out, he was still standing up with the shelf on top of him, you could just see his legs poking out and 50 bottles of smashed vino all over the place.

    Another time a guy was transporting a big tank of water he used to water flowers outside in a little garden centre, managed to knock a nozzle off the water tank on the shop floor, I walked round the corner there he was drenched head to toe hundreds of litres of water spraying in every direction, 50 customers staring at him in amazement.
     
  4. pitts

    pitts Member

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    i work as an electrical engineer and when i first started my apprenticeship i worked at british bakeries which was the hovis factory. I remember one time working in a massive empty cellar on my own changing a light and switched the wrong mcb off so when i started taking the wires out of the broken light i got electricuted and fell off the ladders and cut my head open but whilst i had fallen i had also managed to trip the breaker. So was left lying on the floor in a massive pitch black cellar in pain.

    the company i work for now used to have to wear overalls that were like dungarees and a welder once went for a shit and didnt pull them down properly so when he finished he threw them back over him but the shit and some tissues were stuck to his dungrees so when he threw the dungarees up all the shit and shity tissues ended up going all over the toilet.
     
  5. ApeCat

    ApeCat Human Dubplate

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    Working in the park I had a few mess ups, but this other guy working there was really the accident prone one. In a month he'd crashed two huuuge fuck-off lawnmower tractor thingies, one into a cyclist and one into a car.. No wait, he crashed three; the third one ended up in the river with him underneath it. And he also set fire to himself once. Good times!
     
  6. muzzadj

    muzzadj POW!

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    Exactly the same as yours in the kitchen mate!
     
  7. mr karnage

    mr karnage deep inside the jungle

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    ive done the exact same thing fletch!!!

    you should see my finger now, the nerves are still a bit all over the place but alot better than when i first got the bandage taken off and its my middle finger but its still a little bigger than my forefinger lol
     
  8. ApeCat

    ApeCat Human Dubplate

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    One of ours in the park did that as well, only he used a manhole cover and he's a bit of a [read: massive enormous humongous unrivalled world champion of eternally] cunt so I wrote it off as karma or something.
     
  9. Mr Fletch

    Mr Fletch aka KRONIX

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    That's one thing I'm not looking forward to, getting the bandage changed in a couple of days! You know that fucker is gonna be stuck like a bitch!
     
  10. ApeCat

    ApeCat Human Dubplate

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    Just try not to think about how some of the regenerating tissue has probably merged with the fabric of the dressings and is going to not only stick to it.. you'll have the bandages torn from the inside or your self or some shit and you'll be fine.
     
  11. d-low

    d-low I know you got soul

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    yeah try not to think about that ;) haha
     
  12. Mr Fletch

    Mr Fletch aka KRONIX

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    Thanks lads, lol!
     
  13. chanty

    chanty Active Member

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    my mate in work was in a piss coz we all fucked off early and left him to do the last job of the day which was deliver a few pots of tea and coffee to a room. so instead of putting the pots on a trolley and wheeling them all over he tried to be clever and carry 3 large pots of coffee and a large pot of tea. was going fine through all the PUSH doors until he got to the last door which he had to PULL. instead of asking the receptionist to help him he balanced the boiling pot of tea on his arm and as he pulled the door towards him it knocked the pot of tea all down his stomach.... apparantly he was rolling around in agony infront of customers and he had the scar for about 9 months
     
  14. ONSLAUGHT88

    ONSLAUGHT88 I sees ya I do I sees ya

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    One thing to bear in mind when you get the bandages changed is getting us lot a picture to ponder at :teeth:

    Never really had any dangerous accidents just silly ones really, but I've never had a job involving much danger.
     
  15. mr karnage

    mr karnage deep inside the jungle

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  16. ThePapa

    ThePapa Suffragette City..

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    We accidentally took thousands of people's council tax payments out of their accounts twice in one day. Ahhh the lulz...



    T'was a great day for bank charges.
     
  17. Mr Fletch

    Mr Fletch aka KRONIX

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    Yeah. My pals have asked for pics too for Facebook. I'm gutted I didn't think about it at the time (guess I was too busy trying not to bleed out lol) but have no fear, I shall get pics Thursday morning while getting the bandages changed
     
  18. ThePapa

    ThePapa Suffragette City..

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    That should brighten up my thursday considerably...



    I have to say that's bad luck Fletch. Did it reach the bone?
     
  19. Jwood27

    Jwood27 VICTIM

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    cleaned an oven, had to run out to see a tutor, grabbed a sausage roll on the way without washing hands and ingested oven cleaner.

    spent the next 2 days semi concious being sick everywhere and hallucinating that the irish were going to invade. fuck knows
     
  20. Kenneth4Eva

    Kenneth4Eva Let's Breed

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    broke and dislocated 2 bones in my left hand.

    ---------- Post added at 10:15 ---------- Previous post was at 10:14 ----------

    was a good wank tho