"50 Sacks Of Greeeeeaz" - A DnBForum Erotic Novel

Discussion in 'Waffle' started by $marty, Jun 28, 2012.

  1. $marty

    $marty Dexcell Staff Member

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    Ok, so each post should be roughly a paragraph or so, adding to the previous poster's story. Hopefully we'll end up with an exciting, interstellar, blockbusting novel. Along with an "Opera Winfrey Book Of The Week" sticker or some nausical bullshit.

    And so we begin.....

     
  2. EWOKS

    EWOKS POTATOES GONNA POTATE

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    tallywacker ftw
     
  3. dirty breaks

    dirty breaks Guest

    PROLOGUE

    Sally unzipped his bulging tallywacker and smashed it across her chevy chase. She knew he was excited by the look of his contorted Steven Segal-like face. Suddenly, a hot arc of cockney urine jetted across her moosh. Sally had absolutely no clue what was happening. All she could taste was the warm, acidic salt-like piss splashing into her eyes. It stung and the stench was horrendous. He then proceeded to give her a judo chop to the temple, rendering Sally unconscious.
    Hours later, she awoke to find she had been abandoned in a Butlins in Skegness. Her gritter was sore and giving off the odourous pong of ten-thousand prawn cocktails left in the mid-afternoon sun. With only a discarded, semen-stained, worn out, red-coat for company, she decided to trudge her prolapsed sorry state to the front desk. Someone was going to pay for this. Oh yes. Someone was going to pay....



    CHAPTER ONE

    sally arrived at the front desk, no-one was to be seen. the reception was a mess, and the walls covered in dried blood.
    a thousand and one thoughts rushed through sallys head... 'just what went on here on here?'.
    a low groaning noise came from the otherside of the shuttered front door, soon joined by another and another, until there were countless voices, rising in volume and getting nearer and nearer! sally had to act fast, she ran out of the reception and through a back door, running down the hall faster than a cannonball blindly trying to find her way out of the holiday park of horrors... and then she tripped.

    she woke up with blood flowing from a gash above her temple.

    but she didn't have time to waste.

    she climbed on top of a conveniently placed photocopier and tumbled out of an open window.

    it was dark outside, what was that she could see in the dark distance?

    All of the stars were fading away, trying not to worry, she stood staring, trying to figure out what she was seeing... and then she realised. she clasped her hand to her mouth to stifle a scream.

    the dead were walking.

    a horde of zombies were shuffling towards her, moaning and biting at the air, hungry for blood and meat.

    she ran.

    what was sally going to do? she couldn't survive a zombie apocalypse on her own, she needed to find help. she ran towards the car park shouting in vain for help, All the lights that lead her there were blinding... suddenly a pick up truck full of beige men came out of nowhere, the driver started talking. "wagwarn, i and i say ya get in de back mon, der not be time to stand around mon. we came here for de chicken from de KFC."

    she jumped in the flatbed, deliberately 'accidentally' touching the man in the backs wang as she climbed aboard.

    the driver put the pedal to the metal and accelerated hard.

    sally tumbled backwards, falling out of the truck.

    the zombies picked up pace and were now only metres away!

    "sorry blud we can't come back for you! You'll see us some day, Just take what you need and be on your way" the driver shouted as he sped off into the distance.

    And so, Sally can wait. She knows it's too late as they're driving on by, Her soul slides away...
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 28, 2012
  4. _MILLA

    _MILLA Flamboyant muthafucka

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    im lookin foward to logikz input if im bein honest...
     
  5. $marty

    $marty Dexcell Staff Member

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  6. $marty

    $marty Dexcell Staff Member

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    Get involved you slags. We could be missing out on MILLIONS
     
  7. Skuff

    Skuff Well-Known Member

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    Sally decided to go for a walk by the river, when she got a bit tired and decided to sit down..

    She reached into her hand bag to pick up a packet of cigarette's, but instead pulled out a naked picture of last nights conquest..

    'that's not a cock' she heard from over her shoulder.. 'That's a cock'..

    She turned to see Mick Dundee standing there, shlong in hand, and ready for some hardcore outback action!!

    I'm gonna fuck you Sheila, like i fucked that croc last night! it's gonna be long, hard, and wet... That's fine she said, but my names Sally

    :rolf:
     
  8. Skuff

    Skuff Well-Known Member

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    Sorry bit of a lame one.. Had so much potential, i just went in a bit half hearted.. Think it's down to me being ill, and lazy, and bit shit if i'm honest :gaywhite:
     
  9. herojuana

    herojuana hairy kuala

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    Someone was going to pay for this. Oh yes. Someone was going to pay.... But first she had to dislodge the clumps of solidified malenaise from her gaping chocolate starfish and red raw axe wound. Using a single finger she removed the offending items, and proceeded to head out of the Butlins. As she was settling the bill she went to shake the hands of the receptionist, to acknowledge the end of the transaction, and immediately the filthy old crone behind the desk jumped to life, as her nose picked up the scent of the spaff removing fingers. The old girl went from looking like she wasn't going to last the week to a vile sex demon in seconds. She grabbed Sally's hands and pulled her over the desk, and dragged her away to the dungeon of depravity. The ageing bint screamed "You shall only call me Mistress, do you understand?" As she handcuffed her to a table, with holes below the head and groin. Sally, bemused and in a state that can only be described as Randy-scared, couldn't comprehend what she was saying and just stammered "What?". Mistress had no time for that sort of larking around, and delivered a quick slap across the face, before lowering her festering beef curtains over Sally's face...
     
  10. logikz

    logikz I Am Not The King Staff Member

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    im actually chuckling right now adam this is genius. i will contribute from work but im off until next week, hope its in full swing by then
     
  11. ONSLAUGHT88

    ONSLAUGHT88 I sees ya I do I sees ya

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    Sally yelped in disgust, the curtains were a dark maroon colour kind of circa 2001, they were large in size, way more than a handful. Sally began to panic as she couldn't breathe, both holes were covered with steaks that smelt like supermalt, she jerked in horror at the thought of this being her last moments, she tried reaching around for her bag, she knew she had it here, Sally knows how to make the best of a bad situation and she loves swimming. She feels the bag. Triumph, she unzips it quicker than she has ever undone a mans zip, she reaches in and grabs her snorkel, she raises it in despair and jams it in between the maroon steak and her chops and takes a gasp of well deserved air, all the while mistress is shouting ''Lick it like it's your last!'' So she continues with her task...
     
  12. hyperd4eva

    hyperd4eva H&M SCARVES

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    Slip inside the eye of your mind
    Don't you know you might find
    A better place to play
    You said that you'd never been
    But all the things that you've seen
    Will slowly fade away

    So i start a revolution from my bed
    'cos you said the brains i had went to my head.
    Step outside, summertime's in bloom
    Stand up beside the fireplace
    Take that look from off your face
    You ain't ever gonna burn my heart out

    And so sally can wait, she knows it's too late as we're walking on by
    Her soul slides away, but don't look back in anger i heard you say

    Take me to the place where you go
    Where nobody knows if it's night or day
    But please don't put your life in the hands
    Of a rock n roll band
    Who'll throw it all away

    I'm gonna start a revolution from my bed
    'cos you said the brains i had went to my head
    Step outside 'cos summertime's in bloom
    Stand up beside the fireplace
    Take that look from off your face
    'cos you ain't ever gonna burn my heart out

    So sally can wait, she knows it's too late as she's walking on by
    My soul slides away, but don't look back in anger i heard you say

    So sally can wait, she knows it's too late as we're walking on by
    Her soul slides away, but don't look back in anger i heard you say

    So sally can wait
    She knows it's too late as she’s walking on by
    My soul slides away
    But don't look back in anger
    Don't look back in anger
    I heard you say
     
  13. Bad Ace

    Bad Ace Close2Death

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    im afraid ive put the novel down.shits not gonna selll! WITHOUT PICTURES
     
  14. dirty breaks

    dirty breaks Guest

    If anyone gets all the lyrics references in my chapter of the story then they'll win a guitar pedal or a Neve outboard compressor.
     
  15. rj_dnb

    rj_dnb Well-Known Member

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    It's that new guns n roses track init. Andy c's been busting that dubplate lately
     
  16. dirty breaks

    dirty breaks Guest

    yes. you win all the hardware and synths.
     
  17. rj_dnb

    rj_dnb Well-Known Member

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  18. SIRUS

    SIRUS 変なひと

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    Whilst this is right up my alley. 'The tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs' can't be beaten.
     
  19. IV4

    IV4 Currently a newt.

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    Sally continues with her task...
    She does as the mistress wishes. Counter clock wise swirls of her tounge.
    "Faster bitch" the mistress exclaims in pleasure
    "Faster"
    In this moment Sally knows she is going to have to do what the misstress want, but she also knows if she does not get out of this situation she will die. So while licking the sweet taste of the mistress velvet purse. She formulates a plan to kill her.
    "Ahh yes" she says to herself
    "Misstress!"
    "I did not tell you to speek" the misstress replied
    "But Misstress.... if it would not trouble you to much I would like to kiss you.?"
    "Very well" the misstress said exacerbated
    So sally began to kiss slowly, starting at the clitorus and slowly moving up to her belly button. She sucked with her mouth and used a little bit of teeth to give a small bite followed by a kiss with each swift sensual movement. Simultaneously Sally began to massage her inner thighs with her hands and slowly move her hands up.
    The mistress became intranced with pleasure as Sally moved to her neck with with her mouth.
    "Do you like this mistress?" Sally asked
    "Y-y-y-yes" the mistress said with a studder.
    Sally moved up to her mouth and passionately kissed her while gently slidling her hand to the Mistress's neck
    "I must be strong" sally thought to her self
    Then she began to reach for her bag. "Yes there it is" she thought
    Sally had a stun gun her father once gave her on the out side pocket. He always said," It may save your life one day" Well this day had come
    "Thank you daddy" she thought
    In an insant Sally began to choke the Mistress with an animal like stregth she had neve known. Just as quickly brought the stun gun to the Mistress's vagina.
    "You Like Your Cunt Licked Counter Clock Wise?" she screamed as she used the 10,000 volt on her once soft pussy until it began to smoke
    The mistress tried to scream but Sally's grip on her neck prevent any of that
    This is when Sally became the ultimate Mistress. Her rape was to much to bear. With everything happping so fast her mind has to compensate, She can not and will not be a victim in this horror and that is when she made her decistion.
     
    MAJESTIC likes this.
  20. Joosh

    Joosh New Member

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    It was time to take control of the situation. Sally had the upper hand now. With the speed of AMC on crack, she thrust her hand deep into the old biddy's clunge, past the deep rooted fruit pastilles of her previous labours and through her cervix. She had to infiltrate the source of her power, and Sally knew exactly where to find it. As she rooted her round the gateway to her guts, Sally's cold clammy fingers encountered the golden fallopian tube of madness. Immediately she grasped onto it and wrenched it out the woman's ruined cunt. 'Now,' Sally mused to herself, 'I have the power' She stood up, wiped the blood and gash slop off her face, and walked out of Butlins.