THE BROOL STORY THREAD NSFW

[charlie131]

MOAR BROOL

Right here it goes

I was in my second year of uni and i just got home that friday and decided that i would go and see a friend of mine who used to work in a pretty sweet bar in soho and at the same time take a trip to blackmarket to pick up some promo's..

Whilst my friend and i were having a pint in a pub round the corner from where he works, he bumped into someone who used to be a regular and this private members bar where he also used to work (place is called jerry's run by this joker called phil dirtbox.. pretty filled with the likes of noel fielding and courtney love plus a whole load of gangsta's used to drink there apparantly of dirt box was aphilliated with those sort of people)..

Anyway said friend see's him coming over to him to say hello when he quickly whispers to me "watch what you say around this guy coz he's only been out for 6 months from spending 10 years in a new york prison for something i dunno but i guess its real bad"

few drinks later and friend has to go to work and the loanshark turns to me and says "you wanna follow me around boy whilst I have to do some stuff." I said yes coz he was actually a nice guy and i'd sort of forgotten bout his checkered past by this past..

Whilst we went ot get phone credit for him he turns round and says "you fancy getting some dinner I'm fucking starving" I politly declined saying i had about enough for a maccy d's after buying these vinyls.. his reaction was "boy i havn't paid for a meal in a restuarant for a very long time.."

So we go to my friends bar and go to the dining room up stairs where he starts by ordering a fucking nice bottles of champagne and wine as well as oysters for a starter and steaks for mains.. (I this point i did think he was going to bum me and that i would be able to do fuck all about it

so two bottles of champagne and a bit of wine he turns to me and asks if i do coke and of course i said yeah.. so he went into his pocket and took out a baggy which looked like a least a couple hundred quids worth of blow.. took a massive pinch of it and shoved it up my nose whilst getting it in my mouth accidently and my eye.. I have never had coke like that since, it was so fucking strong..

By the time the starters came we were arseholed and getting along like a house on fire.. He whipped out a lil black book and showed me who owed him money, couple of grand here and there for about 15 people.. and asked me if someone didnt pay up what would be the best to deal with the matter.. i think i said something like get a hammer and break both there hands (thinking i sounded bad ass) he laughed and said "listen boy this is what i do.... find out where they are, get four heavies to drag from where ever he is and get him in the back of the van. tell him if he screams they'll cut his tongue out.. cant remember what he said after that but it was pretty horrific and got me squirming a bit thinking i shouldn't be here (still absoulutly fucked from the coke and champagne.)

after the meal we were still doing fuck loads of coke and drinking. (oh i should say we never went to the bathroom to do just did it right there and then round the table where everyone could see) I notice this fitty walk in and he winks at her, so i ask who that is and he says its sean bean's wife and he shouts for her to come over and she joins in, in everything we were doing, untill the loanshark's friend comes in with her lil kid (who he gave £50 to for no reason.. wish i knew someone like that when i was younger) and sean beans wife was so rude that loanshark threw his drink over her and said if you dont fuck off right now i'm going to throw you out of the fucking window.. (LLLOOOOOOLLLLL)

any way when we split ways he said cheers for the night and walked off whilst i ended up walking from soho to fulham coz i was so smashed ..

hope thats brool enough

[waynenoway]

I was stood in the smoking area at Fabric one night with Matty Nuera having a lesiurely chat about drums and the bass. Then some matey rocks up (i later found out he was a mate of Matt's...), twangled out of his mind and was doing the usual 'Are you having a good night?' munted chat. Being a nice guy i was engaging him in conversation when he suddenly went:

"I've got a driving lesson at 3am this morning"

He was fucked but was certain he had to manouvre a car in a few hours. I looked at him baffled. He said something and then wandered off. Me and Matt both looked at each other and nervously laughed. Good times

[charlie131]

I was stood in the smoking area at Fabric one night with Matty Nuera having a lesiurely chat about drums and the bass. Then some matey rocks up (i later found out he was a mate of Matt's...), twangled out of his mind and was doing the usual 'Are you having a good night?' munted chat. Being a nice guy i was engaging him in conversation when he suddenly went:

"I've got a driving lesson at 3am this morning"

He was fucked but was certain he had to manouvre a car in a few hours. I looked at him baffled. He said something and then wandered off. Me and Matt both looked at each other and nervously laughed. Good times

pretty brool but i always think the best stories of fabs were when there was no smoking ban and all the crazies were either on the dancefloor or on the stair case..

I remember seeing someone getting naked on the stair case then someone running in from no where and stealing his clothes... i couldn't stop laughing for hours on that one

[logikz]

charles is transcending brool today, thats big man tings. and shut up worf.

[waynenoway]

charles is transcending brool today, thats big man tings. and shut up worf.

[richie_stix]

hope thats brool enough

so brool, im brooling a the thought...

[$marty]

I once saw someone try to climb inside a bin in Fabric, at a Playaz night once. Brool...

[waynenoway]

I once saw someone try to climb inside a bin in Fabric, at a Playaz night once. Brool...

Hiding from all the jamp ap innit m9

[Goosey_J]

Okay round 2.

So back in the day me and my hombres used to bosh a lot of MD. A fuck load, in fact. We were in our second year at uni and we were taking it at least 1-2 times a week, consistently throughout the year. After a while it really started to affect me, emotionally speaking. I would get these fucking crazy moodswings, literally all over the shop, worse then some agged out meth whore in need of a fix.

So there comes one week where I end up taking around 3 and a half grams over the space of three days. Without eating. On the eve of the third day of the binge (which happens to be a saturday) I find out from my dear sister that I have to go to Buckingham Palace with my family, as my mum has been awarded an OBE. Basically what that entails is getting some kind of certificate from the Queen or Prince Charles in some long ass opulent ceremony which involves other people who have been awarded MBEs/OBEs/CBEs/Knighthoods. I also find out that this ceremony is to take place early on the monday, leaving me approximately 24 hours to try and get myself back to some semblance of normality.

Now I don't know how many of you have done three back to back days on mud, but those of you who have will know that the comedown is rather horrifying. Especially after your brain is emotionally fried from taking it on a weekly/half weekly basis for the past 6 months.

So after a horrendous car journey to London, we get to Buckingham palace. I am a fucking mess by this point. My emotions are all over the place. I am mood swinging like a fucking motherbitch. Anger for being dragged to London on the mother of all comedowns, pride for my mother, paranoia from thinking that everyone knew what I'd been up to. I literally could not control my feelings. At one point I walked past a painting of some past monarch or other, and burst into tears. My sister is like "what the fuck is wrong with you", to which I garble some reply about feeling patriotic because we were in Buckingham palace.. This only got worse during the ceremony, with royal guards and Gurkha soldiers parading all over the palace. There was one point where a soldier was given an award for bravery (I later found out that this was because he dragged 4 of his dead comrades out of a firezone), which in turn caused my weeping to start again with renewed vigour.

After an hour or two, my melancholy turns to tiredness, and I pass out. I pass out, sat on some ornate, fucking uncomfortable gold chair, surrounded by my family and the families of everyone else receiving an award that day. I pass out with my head lolled right back, mouth hanging open, drooling on myself. I wish at this point I could tell you I am embellishing, but that is not the case. My dad jabs me in the ribs to wake me up, looking at me with the fury of hell in his eyes. I chance a look round and the other people around me are staring, all of them very well to do, rich types, a look of pure disdain on their faces.

I later found out that the ceremony was recorded on camera, and that everyone who got an award that day was sent a copy so they could remember their special day. When I watched my mum's copy back, I discovered that I was sat in such a position that I was in view of the camera for a large proportion of the ceremony, crying, passing out, and drooling on myself. Everyone who got an award that day has a copy of that tape. I sometimes wonder how many of them have watched it and wondered, 'what the fuck is up with that tall curly haired guy in the grey suit'.

[charlie131]

goose thats defently a win post hhaha

[JJEC]

You should post the video on here so we can enjoy the special day.

[armed]

yeah man, vids or it didn't happen

[charlie131]

will tell the brool story of me being in the tsunami at some point as well

[Goosey_J]

No video, it's at my parents house somewhere. God knows where. I think I kind of ruined the day.

Believe me, I wish I could make that kind of shit up. I'd be an author or something by now. And getting paid some serious notes. Dollar, dollar bills y'all.

[Moskit]

Before i posted the op, i wondered if this thread would even work, i envisaged a wrath of "grow up m7" and "thread originator prefers the company of gentlemen" etc... But look at this eh? So... Theres even brool story behind the brool story thread! How fucking brool is that?